angry

Robert · MIP Old Timer

angry

Quetzal · MIP Old Timer

Hi Robert,

I'm so truly sorry that you had a really bad argument yesterday. That always disturbs my peace and I hate it so much. I am so pleased that you didn't pick up a drink, though. Well done. I know, from personal experience, that it really won't solve anything and only adds to the problem.

If I have a problem with my boyfriend we always try to sit down and talk about it. Over fifteen years ago we decided that our relationship was going to be based on complete honesty and, apart from hiding my alcoholism, we have lived that. But, it is often so hard to start but rewarding when we start seeing things from the other person's point of view.

When I get really angry with people, places and things I try to get myself off to a meeting or pick up the 'phone and talk to my sponsor or to somebody else in AA. That usually calms me down and refocusses me. Often, a good walk can help me to reconnect with myself and with my Higher Power, too.

Take care of yourself, Robert, and hang in there,

Carol

tina · Senior Member

Hi Robert

Yes arguements usually never solve anything, I try to work around arguements. It just gives off bad feelings, with those whom we love the most, I'm a single parent and well sometimes it's hard to control the situation. Or letting it go, Got into a bit of arguement with my 17 year old yesterday over a few things.

Then he started to try and lay guilt trip, I told him that it was necessary. By bringing up certain things and the reason behind some of his actions. But ya know I had to leave in order to keep some kind of calmness a bout myself.

I was so angry and frustrated that I went into tears, cause it scared the shit outta me. Told the kids that i needed a few minutes. My kids don't like seein me like this and I just call someone in th e program to talk to, if not a close friend. Um than told my son it's wasn't about him, as he assumed it was.

Thanks for the topic, makes a person understand that their not alone

Hugs and hope works out

Tina

Wren · MIP Old Timer

I'm sorry, Robert. Those kind of arguments can just make a body ill. I'm so glad you didn't pick up. I can never allow another personality to have so much power over me that I allow them to push me in that direction. There have been times I've been oh so tempted, and realized that in "I'll show them" mode, it's an admission of "you have this kind of power over my life (and death)". It's good to be able to really feel emotions, all on their own, and not use behind them. Painful at times, but certainly helps us grow and prepare for the next round of feelings. Learning that we do not have to drink behind things like this is such a good lesson. Again, I'm so glad you thought ahead and stood your ground. love, Chris

timverton · MIP Old Timer

That's not a good situation when you and your mate get into a heated disagreement and I guess the sanity in you is finally overpowering the alkie in you as you as you didn't pick up a drink. During a time like that, that's when you need too be making statements and decisions that require a clear and unaltered mind and you are now realising it. Great work Robert! Congratulations on keeping your head straight! Now I hope for you that all can be resolved to the benefit of both of you...Tim

Dave Harm · Senior Member

Hi Robert -

Anymore I do just about everything possible to avoid confrontation. I still live with a lion inside of me that I pray I can keep caged forever.

Years ago I heard a saying that every time my blood begins to boil I remember...

"Anger is fear turned inside out."

So I try and figure out what I'm scared of... most of the time I have no idea, but while I'm trying to come up with an answer, my pressure always seems to come down...

Dave

Creating dreams, from the nightmares of hell...