to get my white chip... I laid in bed all night thinking about how I was going to go get vodka and sprite today... and I got up and that's exactly what I did. I did try to call my sponsor, but it was one of those things where I was going to call her, tell her what I was thinking and then do it anyway. I'm already feeling a little better... just that anticipation of buying it made me start to feel better. Right now I just don't care. I need something to make me feel better. Probably won't be around for awhile... I don't feel right posting much if I'm drinking... I want to isolate... my friend told me to go to the meetings even if I'm drinking but I don't feel right doing that...
Thanks for your honesty, Lisa. I do hope you continue to post here, though. You have helped me at times with your posting of 'where you are at'. It is a good reminder.
You have to do what you have to do.... for you. And if you do ever want to get sober, I hope it is for you and no one else.
We are all here for you, whenever you need us. Even if you are drinking. As alcoholics, it is what we do!!
If you don't give up, it will happen. I so agree with Phil. It is you and only you who will know when you are ready. Day by day, moment by moment, breath by breath. It can only happen if you keep on going.
I learned that either you do or you don't. Simple as that. You take good care of yourself. Keep coming back.
With hugs/J0-Anne
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I granted myself the gift of sobriety and found my spirit.