I am new here, but need lots of help!

desperatehousewife · Newbie

I am new here, but need lots of help!

Wren · Senior Member

Good morning Desperate, I strongly suggest you go to Alanon. There is also a board like this one for Alanons. But at Alanon meetings you will get the opportunity to meet other men and women who are going thru exactly what you are going thru, and can give you the tools you need to help yourself stay sane during this time. I know that my spouses could never do anything to help me reach out, but they did have the program of Alanon to help them understand this disease and how to cope with it.

You are always welcome to be part of this board, we have many Alanons who share here. Reading the posts here will perhaps help you understand a bit of this disease during the struggle of recovery, and how we live (or try to live) the 12 Steps of the Program.

You are in my prayers, my heart just aches for you. First and foremost, you need to take care of yourself. Blessings, Wren

jonibaloni · MIP Old Timer

My thoughts and prayer go out to you, too, Desp.

You enrich my recovery today just by sharing what it was like for people in my life while I was drinking.

A household of recovery often does begin with the non-alcoholic.... "Let it begin with me" is a heartfelt AlAnon slogan.

If you go to the top of this page, you will see MIP Home Page highlighted. click on it, then lookk for the block entitled, "AlAnon Message Board". It will take you to the alanon folks who post and reply to help eachother, just like on this site. Welcome to this site, also. As Wren said, we have many an alanon here too....

Peace and rest be with you...

Jonibaloni

desperatehousewife · Newbie

Thanks...

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Hi desperate.

Just wanted to say welcome. You're in my prayers.

(and Yes, people DIE a very painful death from alcohol).

desperatehousewife · Newbie

Please do not get upset at me for asking this. But, how does a person die from alcoholism? Does the liver start to give out? I can't get over this overwhelming feeling that my husband is slowly dying.

thank you for your help.

Doll · MIP Old Timer

No one will get upset for asking questions. You don't know, what you don't know.

Alcohol causes many, many health problems, but start here...... Hope it helps.

http://cpmcnet.columbia.edu/dept/gi/alcohol.html

Toni Baloney · MIP Old Timer

Hi Desperate,

just wanted to say Welcome to you, the above Posts to you, I just ditto, and feel for you deeply, Alanon could better advise you, in my opinion.

They suffer in the same way, with what you are going through.

Will you please let us know, how you are getting along with this. Look forward to hearing from you, and please stay here and write all you want. Our doors are always open.

A Big Hug, Toni

Quetzal · MIP Old Timer

Hi Desperate,

I wanted to say welcome to you and to let you know that you will be in prayers today. As some of the other wonderful people have already mentioned to you I'm sure that Al-anon will be of some help to you. I do know that folk from Al-anon read and post here.

Please let us know how things are going for you, won't you?

Take care,

Carol

BarbB · Member

Hi Desperate,

I'm so glad I saw your post today. I'm fairly new here too and I am in the same boat, except that I am also an alcoholic. I am in recovery, but my husband is not. I live in fear that he will die soon or burn the house down accidentally. 9 out of 10 nights he is up all night drunk and falling down all over the place. He cooks in the middle of the night (doesn't eat though) and we have to figure out next day just what it was he cooked. He lost his job over 6 months ago (due to achohol) and has gotten continually worse in his depression and drinking. We had to sell our house (thank God we were able to get a less expensive place) and haven't ended up homeless. I don't know what our future will be. Well anyway, enough about my problems. God bless you, and you are in my prayers. Feel free to Email me....hmmm...are our Email addresses available on this board?

wandajf · Veteran Member

Barb, in answer to your question, yes you can send a message off board just by clicking on their name and following the promps.

to Desperate Housewife:

Today I am reminded of the pain I caused others by my alcoholism, I am greatful for that. I second all the good advice you have recieved, and hope you can find some peace in the halls of alanon. It does happen there. Please let us know how you do, you are in my prayers

Dawnie · Newbie

Dear desperate housewife, I'm new here too. They're many people more equipt than I who have much more experiance in supporting alcoholics and their families. I can however, share with you my experiance, strength and hope. I am 43 and an alcoholic. I have 1 year of sobriety. I remember the worst of it. I too only drank at night. Closed the drapes and made a quart of vodka disappear every night 7 days a week. I had it together. Noone knew, I held a job had a mortgage, owned a car all by myself. But, I had a secret noone knew but me. So I could continue as long as I liked. I wasn't hurting anyone. It was my business. But it was hurting me. I was depressed, scarde, sick, afraid someone would find out. Everynight blackout. Every morning start the fear over. My doctor talked me into rehab. It was a year later that I feared my life would not change until I did. That I may die, if I continued. The thing is, I couldn't get help until I wanted it. I had to make the choice. It is a fearful existance. Until I found AA, there wasn't alot of hope. Now, I don't wake up in fear in the morning. At night I let other AA's show me how to live without it. There is Alanon for families of alcoholics. It could be something to give you support while your dear husband finds his way. Until then...we are all here for you.