... when a sober person in AA publicly tells a struggling, tormented, still drinking alcoholic who deperately wants to stop but is finding it very hard to surrender to.. "s**t or get off the pot" does that mean he should go away and stop annoying this sober community until he is himself sober and on the path of AA?
Is there no room in these places for the struggling alcoholic who is just sharing his pain? Only the sober ones who have got on the path? Has AA now become selective in the people it wishes to talk to?
Upsets me sometimes. We have all been there. I myself know exactly what it is like to struggle with this disease, to live in terror of the world with thoughts of sobriety being the most terrifying thing in the world even though all you want is to stop.
I myself know exactly what it is like to struggle with this disease, to live in terror of the world with thoughts of sobriety being the most terrifying thing in the world even though all you want is to stop.
Yeah, I totally agree. Sometimes I go through this sober. Okay maybe more often than I'd like to admit! This disease wants me to ignore reality and not deal with it. Reality is just painful to a drunk like me. Damn wreckage, but it's getting better.
I know where I come from that when a person drinks,other people just stop helping them because they just do not get it. This is a public board,anyone can come here,but too as it is a public board they open themselves up to comments. Me personally am not strong enough to help the still suffering for fear of being dragged down,or not knowing what to say because the words have already been said. " You can lead a horse to water,but you can't make them drink it." In Rob's case everyone has tried to point him in the right direction and gave him tons of support,but he is the one still drinking and I can see he is not willing to stop any time soon,so... people can argue as much as they want over this one person,but he is happy in his drinking cups. He wants his cake and he wants to have people feel sorry for him while he eats it too. I see people getting angry,frustrated and sad,but Me, I just shake my head and hope that people can get back to sharing and not fighting and have him join us,not the other way around.
I would say from my experience , we all care for each other, and I truly believe that, I believe that what ever we say to each other it is out of love if it be frustration love or happy love. I think we tend to pass on what has been given to us.
It is a tricky one but it says in the big book
We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition.
This shocked me when i first came into the rooms, but now i see the logic, no one is going to do the program with the willingness required until they are desperate enough.
I had to face death or A.A and believe me I didnt know which was worse.
As I said, everyone has a different approach to helping others and if we didnt care, we would just ignore and say there there its ok.
the above are not my words they are the words of the big book, and my opinion does not count. it is just an opinion, my heart always goes out to the struggling, lets face it we do not come to a.a because there is nothing better to watch on telly , we come to aa because life is crap and we are on deaths door.
the trick is to completly surrender. say blow it, my best thinking led me to a drink, do you know what, im going to do what he. did or what she did because he/she is sober and happy.
Yes..your right..I came on pretty strong with that one...
I guess the words that come to mind are.."Tough Love" and let go and Let God" in some cases..
"Shit or get off the pot" simple means...that suggestions to a practicing person..on the steps to take to get sober...have been given over and over again...and if they wish to get sober...its time to take action...
Just having a willingness..does not do it...I had to be hit with a hammer...a few times..when I first got sober..it took a long time to click in..but then again..I didnt want to put that bottle down either...so I tried to play both ends against the middle for quite a while....
And I also agree..that this is a public board...and that anyone has a right to be here..
As for the stuff that went on yesterday...the problem was..that a lot of it...had already been taken private..and it had to be taken to the board..directly..before the mess was solved..Ile call it group concience..and someone had to speak up..before this board went for a crap...
Anyway ...its over with....
You guys have a good day....
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Life is short..Live it sober to the fullest...One day at a time...
A group conscience is a formal thing that is called ahead of time, and where all opinions are invited and respected. 3 people who jump somebody on the public board is hardly a group conscience. Thank you Niall, for speaking up. Your opinion counts too.
Just because Rob didn't jump at your advice you think you have the right to give him an ultimatum? Who the hell are you?
God bless you all,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
I think what everyone wants is for Rob to stop drinking. If he does not then thats up to him,but this is an AA board and the reason to come here is to help stop drinking. To give advice to keep on drinking is plain wrong. So what,Phil gave out some strong words,he ment well. it was also pointed out that if this board is not enough or AA is not enough,then medical help might be needed. They are all suggestions and good ones at that. To argue over the suggestions is just plain dumb when we all want the same thing and that is for Rob to stop hurting himself. I think that there is a power struggle here and has nothing to do with Rob.
