boy talk about an "awakening".....this weekend i didn't feel so good.....took too much of my GABA (changed brands and didnt' notice it was 750 mgs, instead of my 250mgs) and i felt like CRAP........
so as i rested , i did some thinking!!!! and 2 very nice souls answered my "painful weekend" post and confirmed what i already had decided......
i am not going to "dig" for anymore old inner child pain....i mean i remember ENOUGH about the incest/ abuse.....so why dig for more pain???? it makes no sense.....so i decided to do the folloiwng..
FEEL the feelings AS they come up--- per my HP's being in charge of my will/life
take better care of me re: rest/ excercise/ vitamins/ cleansing foods/drinks, etc
SELF talk, lots of self talk like "i love me and i will accept me UNconditionally"and also say it in the 2nd person becuz i hear that adds to its power......and lastly
learn new coping skills with life...yes, the self talk, but also deep breathing, talking me down when i am having an event that is stressing me....muscle relaxation techniques, and the coping skills pertaining to my present day life.......
i think i was getting obsessive about the inner child thing.....i dont' want to go back to the trauma, i dont' think i have to keep going back to it to heal.....i remember enough....i vented for 18 months about it....so like it is time to "ok, learn how to live with me and my limitations and my ptsd NOW....learn how to cope with life in a healtheir form, by working the program and the steps.....step 4 says it all, the EFFECTS of the abuse adn what i did/ felt to cope.....i can CHANGE those patterns with PRACTICE
i hope this made sense......i just think i needed to put a LIMIT on going back and remembering......
I think this sounds like a good plan Rosie. I know for me if I revisit the past too much my brain goes on overload and I can't function very well. I believe that the steps will bring me my spirituality along with a closeness to God. Sometimes this seems like it will never happen with the way my brain works but I do have faith in the program of A.A. I hope you have a wonderful day.
well in the lower doses, like 250 mg 2xper day, it slows down the "traffic" in the brain which can cause anxiety/ seizures in epileptics....it is very calming and by slowing down the nerve impulses, it slows U down..........at least that is what it does for me.......that and vit B-complex....i feel better w/the 2 of them togehter.................
