Hi there, My partner is showing signs of stress mainly to do with work, do you think the other fellowship for partners of alcoholics would help her if she were to take the steps as I am ?
I've asked my wife about the same thing and she won't go,,,I'm stressing her out as I grow and take care of my own business,,,,maybe she will come around,,,hope so
I think it's good to let them know about the alanon program, in case they don't know about it,,, and then they can think about it, even if they decide not to go for now. That's better than not giving them the info in case they would want to, eh?
amanda
__________________
do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
A lot of times of course, the response is: you're the one with the problem, not me!
People go through a lot of changes and challenges as they get and stay sober. I would think it would be nice to have a place to talk with folks whose spouses and families are in the same boat. Doesn't always work that way though.
Sometimes I wish everyone could have 12 steps to guide them ... but all I can do is keep my side of the street clean. Sometimes that helps a lot ... our actions can speak a lot louder than our words ... and sometimes it takes a while for others to come around and see that we really are trying to change for the better.
BTW, when I first got sober, my partner said I was a bigger prick than I ever was when I was drinking. He was right. However, a day at a time... very slowly ... there's been some improvement over these 15 years. And if I'd been drinking during this time I can't imagine we'd still be together. Likely I'd be dead or in prison the way I was going... and I was a fairly "high bottom" case.
yes I have had that, but it is a family illness, my partner was resentfull at AA because what she did for me did not work then a group of strangers got me sober and now I spend time with them! and im usually reading the big book! better than being in a cell though!
she has been to the other fellowship but did not like it. I am powerless.
I have seen similar complaints in the AA literature. And I also did not like the alanon group that was in my area. It was suggested in the literature, if I remember correctly, to balance your life so that she doesn't feel like an AA widow, but your recovery does come first, whether or not she understands what is happening. She might be feeling some loss of 'control' herself and unsure of things as well as jealous. oh, well,,, without neglecting our obligations, we have to do what we have todo, eh?
amanda
__________________
do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
