It is not easy to Live life sometimes, And face the world with a smile. When you're crying inside, It takes a lot of courage To reach down inside yourself Hold on to that strength That's still there, And know that tomorrow Is a new day - With new possibilities
But if you can just hold on Long enough to see this through, You'll come out a new person - Stronger, With more understanding, And with a new pride in yourself From knowing you made it.
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Life is short..Live it sober to the fullest...One day at a time...
not to bad here phil, have been kinda lost lately, maybe allittle depressed but god has been in my life helping me stay strong!!!!!! hope all is well with u phil. you all have been so kind.and i thank god for the this forum everyday and people in it. god bless wagon
Hi Phil! Thanks so much for noticing and more thanks for asking. That means more to me than you know.
Things in my world haven't change very much. I battle with depression everyday, but my children keep me on my toes and don't allow me much time for obsessing. This is a good thing.
I had a serious compulsion to drink just about every night for the last month or so. I would lay in bed and "mix" drinks in my head and ponder what I could lace my coffee with. Thank God, that compulsion has pretty much been removed for the moment. I was in a serious downward spiral but have been lifted by the E S & H on this board and the knowledge that I am not alone in my struggle.
My life is still in a "holding" pattern (not by choice), as I go into month six of waiting for the custody/relocation decision to come down from the court, following a daily four month trial. With this waiting, I am getting better at treading water. I am not a very good "sit on your hands" kinda gal but recognize sometimes I need to be still and stay in one place until I am strong enough to go on. Perhaps that's what this time in my life is for. I can either wallow in self-pity and allow this to be the worst time in my life, or I can look at it as an incredible opportunity for growth. I have to allow myself to be humbled however... for me that means going back to step one and "feeling" my powerlessness. As a binge drinker, I struggle with acceptance of my powerlessness so maybe I am in need of another reminder. Anyway...
I'm not liking the person I have become since the divorce and custody battle began. In fact I hate that person but don't know how to make her go away right now. It is going to take a while for the healing to even begin I am afraid. Right now, it takes all of my energy to make it through the day while being the best mom I can be to my 3 y/o twins. I try to keep my focus there and on a power greater than myself. Just one day at a time.
I really respect the time and energy you invest to this board with your daily contributions. I can't begin to imagine how you do it, especially with what you are going through right now. In my view, you have been a rock on this board... always there for somebody else. I hope you know you are in my thoughts and prayers as you face your own daily battles.
