well sunday has seem to come with great new chalenges for me. while things have been going steady and i have been working on my steps ,other things seem to keep pileing up .im not sure how to react to.my children i think have noticed that im different.they seem to be pushing further than they ever had .now i have tried to keep my witts but today i almost lost it on the 2 olderst(ethan5&hayden2)they were jumping on there brothers bed and after asking them a thousand times to stop they completely broke the bed .i am sopissed and i know i cant beat themor even spank them.im so freaking mad to make things even more complicated an old friend has been calling looking for a ride i know its out of the ?because i saw jills face when i said i might be able to get out for a bit and after thinking aout it i know i cant.iwas going to do a lott of things today church a f2f and i wanted to look for a book that was recomended.i havent done jack chit and i a little pissed off aout that.im dealing with all of this oof corse as beast i can.well i should be glad that im working 1-2-3 rather than nothing at all just wanted to talk through it all 4-is inmy sights ill keep you all posted thanks for listening
Hey Benny, Glad you vented here, go to a meeting, read some in the Big Book or 12 and 12. Is the bed fixable, maybe not today, but in the future...when you're calm and doing better, get the boys to help you fix it.
Welcome to the world of sobriety, it gets better and then there are those days that make you want to kick and scream, and you do it sober, living life on lifes terms. Has your wife checked out Al-anon yet? Hang in there....
Are kids still jumping on beds? I remember what fun I had doing that years ago. Then I got bigger,,, and ,, well,,,, I think I broke one too.
Some things are a matter of perspective,,, when we are too close to it it can seem like all there is. Sometimes we need to kind of back off and make some space. You say you're not goin out at all? hmm... if I stay in too long I get cabin fever, and people start to get on my nerves. Course,, it depends on where we go... a meeting is a good thing.
Sometimes when we get dry, we notice things more.. lol not passed out for things... but then we don't know how to cope any other way... and that is what recovery is all about.
hang in there,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
Yes they do Amanda as our two replacement matresses will testify! We bought a restored antique Iron brass topped frame/bedstead approx. 10 years ago, the kids have all grown up climbing it, jumping off the top, swinging on it like monkeys, I reckon it`ll be a big part of their memories when they`re older..
