My sponsor says if you don't get mad once in a while, you're not working the program hard enough.......Guess I've been going at it full force the last few days...
There are some with many years of sobriety, but it seems very LITTLE recovery. Bitch and moan constantly about what's STILL going wrong, what they plan to do and it's always the same thing that was going wrong when they first started AA. I say, if I can't count on this program to work all 3 sides what the hell good is just staying sober! Maybe it's good early on, but shouldnt' there be a point where more has to be done?! AND to hell with "one day at the time". If I can't believe that AA will work for me TOMORROW, then what the hell good is this program at all!!!
"Insanity--doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result"
I find I just want to SCREAM this at the top of my lungs sometimes!!
It works if you work it, yes, but there are soooo many that half ass work it. They think because they're in AA life is supposed to be peaches and cream. All their problems solved. Bullshit! Grow the f*#k up!! Stop your crying and really WORK THIS PROGRAM. And if you can't, get the hell out of MY WAY so I CAN!
No replies are necessary, but feel free, of course..........My apologies, I REALLY just needed to vent.
Love you all.
Thanks for letting me "bitch and moan"
Doll
-- Edited by Doll at 09:05, 2005-11-17
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
Often the oldtimers become complacent in the program, and complacency sometimes leads to judgmentalism. I'll probably stop attending the Friday night meetings in my little prairie town; that's when the bulk of the oldtimers show up (and they tell the same story, over and over and over. . .)--oldtimers who tend to look down their noses if the "status quo" is tweaked.
And, oh yes, I'm a tweaker!
All I can say, amiga, is don't let the slugs get you down: Work the program for You! And if you put a kink in their collective colons, go for it!
I used to say that daisies should bloom in my path since I was sober...as if I had done something so wonderful that all should bow down and kiss my a**. I forgot that lots of people never even think about drinking and live happy productive lives.It took a few years to realize that I owed the world something back for my behavior, not the other way around. Some people never get that far I guess, and I would say that their lives are probably not as content as those that do.
And it's ok to vent Doll. That's what we're here for.
DOLL>>>>>>>>>>>If I can't believe that AA will work for me TOMORROW, then what the hell good is this program at all!!!
ROSIE>>>>>>>>that is why i am busting my guts today, cuz what i do today, MAKES my tomorow............ good share, and what the hell??? i vent a LOT.....they say the more intense the pain?? the more intense the emotions.......my sponser says "the deeper the pain??? the deeper the recovery"........i have done my share of venting and bitching and moaning but then it is time to "ok, NOW lets work on solution".....my sponser wont let me just "pee and moan" she wants to hear what i am going to DO about it......................see ya/ rosie
MIKEL>>>>>>>>>>Often the oldtimers become complacent in the program, and complacency sometimes leads to judgmentalism.
ROSIE>>>>>>>>>oh yeah, i've been in recovery since mid feb'04....20- months and i have had the *old timers* come down on me for having to discharge all the pain i supressed over all these decades....but you know what????? people who judge are not working their program/inventory...and i am not HERE to win people's approval...i am here to win my freedom and my recovery.....what EVER it takes to heal me, i am gonna do.......i developed some awful *survival traits* and its gonna take work to heal them............i PRAY i never lose my being humble.....i am zero without my Higher Power working within me..................hugs/ rosie
Yeah! Ditto to all the above! And besides all that. it was 1 degree below ZERO (farenheit) when I started out for work yesterday morning! JEEEEZZZZ!
BUT, I went to work, came home, went to bed, and got up the next day.....ALL SOBER! By golly, you are right Doll....this program can work more than one day at a time!
I look forward to going to bed because it marks another day sober & I can say to myself, that I made it thru another one. Whew! At that time, Then I have a wonderful new day to look forward to….another day where maybe a miracle or other great things are possible!
ROSIE>>>>>>you know i do too now, its like i am headed off to bed within the next few minutes, and i am going to pray/ meditate and do gratitude with my "God work" and say thank you God that 1-- i paid off my credit card today...LAST payment..now i am current!!! ......2....i am sober.........3.....i do good todays to make my tomorows good, cuz my tomorows are the end result of my todays.....used to be the ole gloom and doom....but not now!!!! oh i don't get all high on gr8 expectations, but life CAN get better.....i CAN see my dreams happen....it CAN....i CAN....with my HP with me, who can be against me????? thanks christine for your share/ rosie
Wow, so true, I had even quit going to meetings for awhile for those reasons, and just supplemented it with church, and the results were very good, I can now go to meetings to enjoy them, looking over that bunch, as I am a firm believer in the way the program is supposed to be-caring, sharing and above all (for me) is listening to the ones who do need to vent, because they usually only speak the truth, and the ones who usually don't like it, are usually the ones who are not working a program...
I have had a number of people in the program try to tell me that I was spending too much time in church, and as I posted else where, if it were not for that, and some of the really good A.A.'s, I am quite sure that I would not have stayed, as I really needed someone to show me how to live, not to criticize...
What works for one, does not work for others, and I definitely need more security than one day at a time, and have found that with a much larger support from the church than I did in the rooms, which came as kind of a surprise, seeings they're supposed to be somewhat related, that I can look forward to tomorrow, and of course it helps to have little regrets of today..
I think the one ??? at a time may apply when you're dealing with some of harder headed ones who think that only there way works....
I don't know, but I thought that this group of many different kinds of people was put together to show all the various ways of recovery, and let the person who is willing (with our help) put together a program that works for them....
And in reference to the insanity thing, Love it, something alot of the elders forget-what necessarily kept you sober today will not keep you sober tomorrow, and that's what I am learning-to gain progress-I must make progress..
Guess I'm venting now LoL -------It is just that, since I started working the program with a servants heart, I have truly been Blessed with recovery-Awesome
At that time, Then I have a wonderful new day to look forward to….another day where maybe a miracle or other great things are possible!
-------It is just that, since I started working the program with a servants heart, I have truly been Blessed with recovery-Awesome