It's been 14 days since my last drink, and so far, it hasn't been hard. It's been the BEST 14 days in the last 25 yrs of my life! Am I missing something? Could this be the calm before a storm? Am I too arrogant or cocky about it all?
I've always been a spiritual person. I happen to believe in the God that created heaven and earth and sent His son to die for my sins. I have seen what He can do, in my life as well as others. I believe in miracles....... I have heard many in the rooms of AA state they had/have a problem with their Higher Power! i.e. didn't believe, wasn't sure, wasn't willing, etc., etc. None of this applies to me. So, now I'm terrified! It's been way to easy not to drink. I feel I could just run through most of the steps with ease. I don't have a problem surrendering to my higher power, believing He can restore my sanity, I've taken personal inventory all my life, I know what most of my character defects are and want to know the rest and how to fix them and so on. I desperatly need to make amends to those I have wronged and look forward to doing it, etc, etc..... so I need to know Am I missing something? Am I setting myself up for a slip? ....Insight, thoughts, suggstions are greatly appreciated.... []
Hey "op". I don't think you are headed for a slip. You must remember we all got here because of alcohol. God, uses the 12 Steps and A.A. for the good of each of us in the program, but none of us has gotten sober in the exact same way, some still crave alcohol , some don't . Some have slips, others never do, some have a hard road to follow and others seem to breeze right alone, no two experiences are the same. But you will always be able to find someone who has had an experience close to yours.
Keep ir simple, one day at a time, and don't project to far into the future.
Most of what I choose to project about never comes to pass. Miracles do happen, one day of sobriety is a miracle. Keep working on your program, get with your sponsor and work your steps. Take all the time you need, don't rush, just take it easy. There is nothing wrong with you. God delivered me from alcohol, 6 years later I found A.A. , it gave me the steps that delivered me from me...everyones experience is different.
Have a great sober day, and do the next right thing.
I agree with Gammy...people come into the program in different ways and some are more ready than others. In the early days of AA, the time frame was quite different. The alkie would spend 2-3 days detoxing and within 2 weeks were out there doing 12-step work and carrying the message of recovery to other alcoholics. They did the steps quickly...and they did them throughly.
There is a small window of time where people feel their powerlessness and then begin to feel that they are okay...it is important to start working the steps immediately so that we don't feel that we have gotten our power back. Find a sponsor and start working the steps...and you won't have a problem. I believe in miracles too...the fact that I am sitting here sober is to me only by God's grace and intervention.
when i came out of my first treatment center i was on the pick cloud i heard spoken of, but i also knew I wasn't done yet.
6 months later i was back in detox and sick and tired of being sick and tired. I went to another treatment center. While i was there, and that fog lifted somewhat, i realized that I wanted to live. REALLY LIVE!!! I became willing to go to any length to stay clean and sober. I went from that one treatment center to another, the first being a 28 day program, the latter was for 3 months. I was there for 3 1/2. What I found in that time was the DESIRE, the WILLINGNESS, to do what ever it takes to LIVE.
it all comes down to how bad we want it.
I'm a firm believer that i see in my minds eye will come to pass. So, i don't see myself relapsing...i see myself clean and sober, happy, serene and living life on lifes terms.
So far it's working:)
if you think it's easy, then it may be for you, but know that a time may come, when you least expect it, that it's not so easy. Remember when that happens, if it does, how you feel today.
I had a problem with step 1 for a time....but once i accepted i am an alcoholic, surrender followed. I still have to do step 1 every day.
Step 2 and 3 i had no problem with once i accepted my disease. I have more faith today than i ever have. Most of all in myself, i believe that comes from working my steps constantly and of course having faith in my HP.
I still have bad days, but they pass. I have good days, i have great days. They pass to. If i didn't feel a pinch, then i wouldn't feel a kiss.
I don't think there is anything wrong with you!! and congrats on 14 days!!!!! Way to go!!
Thank you all for the insight. It has helped me much. But I am ashamed to say I have yet to get a sponsor! There aren't many women where I am, and the ones that are there don't have anything I want. They have more recovery time, BUT a couple live in shelters, one can't talk about anything but her soon to be ex husband and it's always w/vengence, etc. Don't get me wrong, I'm not judging them, but they are not sponsor material. Seems as if all the female sponsors have more sponsees than they can handle! At a meeting today I asked one of the men to help me with finding one. He was helpful in telling me who I needed to talk with and go from there...... I hope these 3 women he named will be at a meeting soon, I have only seen 2 of them once and at that time didn't know they were willing........ so, wish me luck guys, cause I have no desire to slip and I desperatly want to continue recovery........
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