Keeping your mind off it.

paul86 · Veteran Member

Keeping your mind off it.

Phil · MIP Old Timer

Howdy Bud..:)

Dont know bout anyone else...but I will share,that it took about 250 days, before that craving and complulsion to drink left..

Its a pretty BIG obsession of the body and mind....and the mind kept saying (For a number of days) "I need alcohol!!"

The only thing that saved my ass, was meetings, meetings, and more meetings. Phone calls to others in the program screaming that "I wanna drink"....they had been there, and knew how I felt....the same way that we know, how you feel.

We didnt get sick over night...and its not going to get all better in 2 days.

Hang tough!!

Just for this 24 hours "I will not pick up a drink"

Ride it out bud....

It gets better..

And a basket case?

Hell our friend....Im still a basket case...But Im sober..:)

lani · MIP Old Timer

Best of luck Paul,
I too had to go to ALOT of meetings!! Some days I would hit 2-3. Luckily where I live theres meetings all day long. Sitting in the house drove me crazy! i would have rather been somewhere around people with the same problem as me.
Keep up the good work!
My obsession also slowly went away by praying to my HP simply to take it away.... And lo and behold, it worked!!! A willing heart and mind is key as I havent even attempted to do that with cigs yet! One thing at a time!!! Lani

Sobrietyspell · MIP Old Timer

This worked for me too, Paul. Going to meetings & meeting new sober friends, reading literature, sharing online here too. All helped keep me busy & to be absolutely blunt.. I talked non~stop about my obsession & recovery until enough time had passed that I started finding other interests all of a sudden! The fog & constant preoccupation with drink, its problems & culture began to pass & now I'm able to speak about other things like the joy of recovery & other day to day stuff of simple ordinary living. Another difference is that I now have much better things to do with my time than be hammered, hungover or anticipating my next drunk. There is life after a drink & you're heading straight for it 1Day@aTime. Follow these suggestions & you're on your way. Like Phil says, hang tough, ride it out & you'll find for yourself. Take it easy, Paul. Babysteps ~ onwards & upwards. Glad you're still here! Well done on your 2days. That's great. Keep it up, Danielle x

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Hey Paul,

keep some hard candy (go buy a bag of jolly ranchers) in your pockets and pop one in your mouth regularly. Pick up a gallon of ice cream while you're at it.

Alcohol is sugar and so are a lot of the other ingrediants in booze, so the your body (and brain) are acustomed to having large quantities of sugar and that's a large part of the cravings. Eat 3 good meals a day and fill you day with activities that don't have anything to do with drinking. Make sure get enough sleep, even if you have to take naps. A couple meetings a day will help you from getting lonely, make some friends gets some phone numbers and hang out. There may be an "AA Club" near you, look for one. I found that I wasn't too good with meeting schedules in the early days (I still am not) and AA clubs have
around 4-10 meetings a day like 7am, noon, 5pm, 7pm, 8:30pm and many have 10pm and midnight meetings on weekends. All I had to do was teach my car to go there instead of the liquor store and hit the cruise control.

-- Edited by StPeteDean at 20:37, 2008-01-04

BGG · Senior Member

Hey Paul:

I agree with all the others here: what saved me was meetings, meetings, some more meetings, and phone calls with my sponsor or others in the Program when the thought to drink came. Eventually, it lifted (for me it took a full year) . . . now, I just have to deal with other negative feelings that sometimes crop up (self-pity, feelings of inferiority, etc.). And, the solution to that: meetings, meetings, meetings, some more meetings, and phone calls with my sponsor, and application of the 12 Steps. Keep coming back; it does get better.

paul86 · Veteran Member

Why the self pity and inferiority? You should be proud, you overcame something that a lot of people aren't able to! Everybody makes mistakes, some different than others. I know once out of this rut i'm going to use this as a driving force to get my life started properly and successfully.

Sobrietyspell · MIP Old Timer

Hear, hear, hear! Oh, the self pity? That's the cunning, baffling & powerful part of the spiritual malady for me, Paul. I think I have everything to be proud of.. Nah, nope, fraid not. My disease & illness wants me back in the gutter , self~rioteously drunk & its favourite route there, for me, is yep.. self pity, fear & inferiority. Tells me my confidence is arrogance & tries to make me coy, shy, ineffective, daft, stupid, ignorant, scared, weak, indecisive, did I mention fearful?? I'm sick of it. Sick of being, feeling sick, scared, ineffective, bored, unopinionated-when it is clearly called for e.g. when dealing with people in work. Roll on a few more months of recovery when I can get over myself & be a little more normal cuz I'm not so scared of getting it wrong. It's much better to get it wrong in the first place & deal with arising consequence than to be paralysed useless by fear. Otherwise, how can I ever learn by trial & error if I don't try in the first place! I'm sharing all this for myself. To get over my own crawling cowardice & get some Goddamn confidence instead of being like a frightened rabbit no~mark. Not attractive in a 30 year old woman I can tell you. About time I got some gumption & self~belief. God is with & inside me. I've no reason to carry on crawling, sorry for the air I breath!

I wasn't expecting any of this to come out but I'm glad it did. I need to get back up onto my own self~respecting 2 feet & be the adult I am. I've been a little overly childful of late & I'm glad I'm just about ready to do some growing up again. I suppose one has to regress some before each growth spurt. Thanks for listening & inspiring me to share. You guys are awesome. Enjoy your meetings, Paul. It does get better. Much better. Danielle x

BGG · Senior Member

Couldn't have said it better, Danielle! And today, was a good, non-self-pitying day for me. One day at a time, it gets better.

Sobrietyspell · MIP Old Timer

No self~pity today, BGG? A good day indeed! Well done, dear one. Glad to see you're feeling better in yourself & fighting fit. That's what we like to see ~ A bit of healthy pride!! (none of that false stuff ;) Take great care for yourself me fine fellow. Heads up the lot of us. Yours all in grateful fellowship, Danielle x

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

paul86 wrote:

Why the self pity and inferiority? You should be proud, you overcame something that a lot of people aren't able to! Everybody makes mistakes, some different than others. I know once out of this rut i'm going to use this as a driving force to get my life started properly and successfully.

Hey Paul,

paradoxically alcoholics have been described as "egomaniacs with low self esteem". It's like and all or nothing roller coaster. It's all in the book "the 12 steps and 12 traditions of AA". Look in your meeting schedule for a step meeting and check it out.

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Meetings, meetings, meetings.....get a sponsor.....get some phone numbers.....talk to other recovering alcoholics......read the BB....Pray.....meditate.

rudd · Member

I'm new too, but..

For me, dark chocolate helps, straight-up cranberry juice also.

I try to remember my last drunk and the consequences. And the other times I showed my be-hind due to being drunk, esp. when I was an ass-aholic to my wife, who, thank God, did not leave me as she threatened to. Remember loosing jobs due to non-performance. Remember how bad I felt all the time, how anxious.

I've been sober almost a month, hardly any time at all, but already I feel lots better, money issues are letting up, my self esteem at work and my marriage are better, etc.
I think about these things, eat some chocolate, drink some juice. Read the "adventures" in the big book. There are other such stories online somewhere, I don't think it's this board.

Yes, here it is 1:15 in the morning, and the cravings are hitting me. I cannot sleep. Fine. I'll sleep sooner or later. Even if I don't, I'll be better at work tomorrow than coming in still half drunk or hungover. I bet I won't get fired for being tired either.

I also find int helps to keep my hands and mind otherwise occupied, for me I do things around the house. Scared the dickens out of the wife when I started cleaning all the accumulated crap out of closets and cabinets - the result of an unmanagable life.

And remember, you only have to not drink for one 24 hour period, and there's only one drink you need to avoid, the first one. Hang in there. Read the big book. Look for one called "The Dark Night of Recovery" - Hazelwood Press. Also, the book "Living Sober" is/was a great help, I think you can read it online at aa.org.

And yes, hit those meetings. They will make you feel better.

-- Edited by rudd at 01:42, 2008-01-09

Sobrietyspell · MIP Old Timer

Welcome to MIP, Rudd. I'm glad you've joined us & thanks for sharing your ES&H already. Would you like to start a thread of your own so we can get to know you better? I'm Danielle, alcoholic from Liverpool, living sober 1Day@aTime since 01.10.06. Glad to see you here. Seems like you're doing well. Share some more, Rudd! Catch you again soon, Danielle :)

paul86 · Veteran Member

Tomorrows your 1 year Danielle!

rudd · Member

If I knew what an ES&H was, I'd be a little more ahead in the game. I'm in south-east Georgia.

I don't see any reason to start a new thread, but I'd like to be to the point where I'm looking at a blue chip... (1 year). I'm happy for ya. Right now, I'm looking at the brown chip - 30 days - (my home group is called Brown Bag Group, dual meaning I think, now it means bring your lunch to the meeting. )
30 days is more than I've ever done. So, no drink tonight. No drink tomorrow. To see people with a year, or like my sponsor with more than 10 years.. it's inspirational. It shows it can be done. One day at a time.

Paul, you still with us?
HALT- Hunger, Anger, Lonely, Tired - four things to avoid.
Seriously, as I was reading myself to sleep last night, I picked up Living Sober. Get it, find it, read it. It covers everything you ask about much better than can be covered in a message board. Read it, read it again.

Get a sponsor, some one you can call when it gets really bad.

I was so tired last night, I got the "stinkin thinking" - Just one, you can't sleep after all. Just one, your wife's out of town, who's to know? So, I had lonely and tired working against me. No, no, no, I am NOT having a drink, I can make it an hour till I go to sleep. Picked up LS, and started reading. Asked the Big Boss for a little help, it came. I could physically feel it. This is coming from a former agnostic.

Today at work, I got a compliment from my boss on the way I dealt with a difficult co-worker. I dealt with her the way AA has taught me, the woman is ill in her head, she cannot piss me off as I know she is ill. I hope for her recovery.

That made my day, that and also something good that happened to a friend that's also in the program.

So I got a little reward today. No stinking thinking tonight.

Paul, if you've made it through all this rambling.. you say you already feel better. Bud, it just keeps getting better and better if you stick with it and work the steps. Yes, there will be some times it's not fun. But to me, last night, bad as it was, was better than being sick and tired.

I read the DUI announcements in the paper today, if you get three, you get your name and photo in the paper. I am so lucky I never got one. I saw a guy that I knew from the bar I used to go to in there today. That was helpful. What's that old saying - "There but for the grace of God, go I."

paul86 · Veteran Member

I'm at a week right now and I feel great. On top of not drinking i've been going for runs every night and I feel so much better physically and mentally. My goal right now is for january to be a completely sober month. Once I make that, i'll make a new goal. Now all I need to do is get over the fact i'm not with my girl anymore, as pathetic as that sounds. :(

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

goog news Paul86. Don't worry too much about the girl. If she likes the new you, she'll be back. If not, then she will probably find another active alkie to be with. That's the way it generally works, that codependents (or alanons) are attracted to alcoholics. As you get heathier you'll attract and be attracted to heathier people. In other words you will out grow her if she is not on some kind of similar spiritual path of recovery. They need recovery too, but they don't need to hear about it from us. Are you getting to any meetings?

-- Edited by StPeteDean at 09:03, 2008-01-10

paul86 · Veteran Member

Actually i'm going to one tonight with one of my dads good friends. :)

rudd · Member

I like what Dean said about "the new you". My wife recently said it was like being married to a different guy.. she likes this one better, he doesn't get drunk and pick arguments, can actually make sense most of the time, and is a better father.
Paul, you have a good goal, but listen at the meeting when they say "One day at a time". You're probably riding the pink cloud right now, feeling so much better it's almost exhilirating. Some folks manage to keep riding that cloud, some run out of cloud - which is what happened to me. That's how I got down to "One hour at a time" the other night, but the hours added up to 24 when I was done. I hope you never run out of cloud, but forwarned is forearmed. Remember, alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful.