Hello everyone and thank you in advance for reading this. Please do not be offended I just need some help. I am a compulsive gambler and I haven't gambled in a little over 9 months. I went through the 12 steps with an AA sponsor however. Now the problem is that I still attend mostly AA meetings. I don't drink very often...maybe once a month and I'll have like 2 drinks but that isn't the point. I feel like a fraud going to an AA meeting saying that my clean date is over 9 months. I don't believe alcohol is a problem with me seriously but I feel like crap lately. I'm in college and there are parties all around and while I try to stay away, I don't want to be a loner. My problem is that I want to be able to sponsor those in AA but I feel like I'm kidding myself. I need help in finding out what to do. I'm not in fit spiritual condition at the moment. I just want to stop running the show and I know that the few times in these last 9 months since gambling that I have drank it is all fear based. I'm just acting out in another way. I would love to hear from others on how to handle this. See the other thing is that there are so few GA meetings and the recovery is nearly non-existent. Thanks all and God bless.
Hello TTOSBT, I you feel like you should give up drinking for a while then go for it. There is no good reason to drink and a ton of reason not to. Even though you're in college there are many students there that don't drink and even if you attend a party, that doesn't mean that you have to drink. Try going and drinking a soda in a cup of ice, stay for an hour of so and leave. That's what I do. My son is a junior at the UCF and he has never drank, has lots of friend that do and it doesn't affect his social life at all. Last thing I want to say is that if you're working on your gambling addiction (and bravo btw!) then you know that all addictions are OCD's obsessive compulsive disorders (*not AA speak).
My point is that you should be careful not to "switch addictions". Although alcohol might not be your "drug of choice" it could certainly lead you back or cause you to "slip up" with your gambling. I also admire you for your honesty. That's the most important ingredient in recovery.
Guys great points I hear ya. Thanks so much and I really appreciate all the advice. You guys were right on. I spoke to my first sponsor today and he said even if I drank that once and being that I didn't like the effect, that I'm most likely not an alcoholic but he said that drinking is just another form of me acting out. He said I wouldn't feel like drinking if I trusted and relied upon God and he is totally right. He also said that I shouldn't stray away from AA meetings because it is about me, not everyone else. Basically along the same lines of what you guys said.
