I got to roughly 3 weeks alcohol-free last time and while I'm not feeling withdrawals quite as bad I think the main issue here is that I don't have the tranqualizers to dumb me down. I'm not going to drink - I've already determined that but man it's gonna' be a longer road than before...
;_;
It's especially rough on nights like these - The only one who stays up at night is my brother who's drunk as hell. It doesn't help that I'm alone housesitting my parents' place. *Sigh...*
I think I'm going to go over to his place for some human interaction and I'm definitely not drinkin', like I said, but it's not fun having to resort to him for "support..."
Okay don't want to sound too brutal here ( given that you will be feeling sensitive ) BUT relapse is no accident, why i'd go as far as to say your planning your next one ? I apologise if i've got this wrong but you are going to seek support from your brother who will most likely be drinking or drunk ? You know if you sit in the barbers chair long enough you are gonna get a haircut.
Go to a meeting my friend , in my early days if i didn't go to a meeting or pick up the phone i would most definately picked up. You will find the support that you NEED there, however what we need and what we want are not always the same thing?
I see a lot of people now, reaching out to you, and sending you to local groups where you will get support and establish contacts for those lonely moments when you need support. I also see you isolating yourself! yep, and I agree with alligot that it looks like you are really already planning your next drink by ignoring some good options and painting yourself into the corner where the bottle is.
It's up to you, dat.
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
It's going to be harder than before? Why? Do you still want to drink? If you do, go ahead. Don't stop until you're ready to live and enjoy your life without it. Other than that, you can keep drinking as long as you want, or until you die. You REALLY have to make up your mind that the alcoholic life is one that yo don't want or need before you quit. Other than that you're fucked from the start. Good fortune to you in choosing Pookie. With love in recovery...Tim
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"We posess the eyes through which the universe gazes with wonder upon its own majesty."
Every time I quit was worse than the previous times, hence my strong desire to not have to quit yet again. I think such is the progression of the disease. Like some have said, when it beats you up enough, you will be ready to "do anything to have what we have". Now that I've got "what we have", I stay away from drinking in order to keep it, rather than to avoid something else. A subtle difference perhaps, but a powerfully motivating one - at least for me! (;
POOK, You seem to be getting some really great advice. You also seem like a very intelligent person. Everyone here is giving this advice because they want you to succeed in your sobriety and they know what works. Like I said on a previous topic that I just posted on I myself am going to start taking that advice. How come you do not go to meetings or have you tried going? The best part, in my opinion, is talking to the people after/before the meetings. It is a great way to get phone numbers and just have some sober people around you. Any questions that you have had or have can be asked to anyone there and trust me they are very helpful. You have stated that you are lonely in a few of your posts.... this is a way that you are guarenteed not to be alone. All you have to do is go to a meeting and see it for yourself... The people that I have met through meetings stay in the back of my mind and in a way they help me stay sober just by remembering what they have said to me. What do you have to lose?
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"Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn't"
When it gets too sore you know where we are