Once I have learned to set my boundaries, others may try to ignore them or accuse me of being selfish.
I know my boundaries have been crossed when I begin to feel uncomfortable inside, and I need to pay attention to this feeling. If others are used to relating to me in a certain way, and I'm changing, it usually means they have to change too.
They may resist this change, but I'm not here to make other people happy; I'm here to make myself happy. If I don't want to change my mind about a boundary I've set, I don't have to. Other people will have to learn to live with the "new me."
I recognize this new attitude as a sign that I'm getting stronger every day.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
hmm. I have had to learn to set boundaries, but it's not an issue of 'it's either you or me, and I'm looking out for number 1'. I'm not here to just make me happy. That's what I was trying to do with the booze. I'm here for the common good. I'm here to 'Love' - to work for the real best interests of the beloved - and now that does include me, but also my family, community and the world. I think there is a line across which it is selfishness.
boundaries are necessary for myself, but also to keep good order in groups,
love, in recovery,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
