I spent a few hours with my sister today. She is my most reliable drinking partner. I had not seen her in approx seven wks, since I stopped drinking. While talking we discussed our drinking habits, past, present and future. We agreed that we are children of an alcoholic and had a few good laughs about our behavior regarding alcohol. We laughed so much in fact that drinking didn't really seem like that much of a problem at all. For the first time in my pregnancy I contemplated getting drunk. I thought about picking up some wine on my way home. I imagined having a glass, just to help me sleep of course. Women in Europe do it all the time. Then I imagined two glasses and a pack of cigarettes just to relax for once in the last 2 months. I'm scared. And ashamed. What the hell is wrong with me. I didn't do it, but I feel so friggin weak, I came close. What about the next time. I'm trying to focus on sleeping tonight. I'm trying not to think about tomorrow.
Dittos Nothing to be ashamed of.. lots of folks worse off still refuse to recognize that kinda thinking working in their heads, recoil from even a glimpse of it...full steam till the bitter end. I would even go as far as to call it a God thing... Meetings, it's a 'we' thing, your own steam will run out. Hang in there.
That is what Alcoholic do ....if we aint drinking we are thinking about it What help me in my early sobriety and even today is i found a suport group people that were doing the same thing i was doing to stay sober...wen i had problems i would pick up the phone and call ...before i pick up the drink ..
The first word in the first step is We...this is a we program ...try not do it alone.
Great job in staying away from it!! As was said, this happens, especially early on, and later on, and years from now. IF and it's a big IF I get one of those urges, I jump on here and read the postings, from my home computer or elsewhere. It helps me a lot. Talk to my sponsor if I can get him. Meetings are at noon and night around here so I can't always get to one........Sometimes it's not one day at a time, but one minute at a time. Good fortune...Tim
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"We posess the eyes through which the universe gazes with wonder upon its own majesty."
First off great job at not taking that drink! Don't feel weak because you thought about it... you should feel strong because it was a strong thought in your mind and you didn't give in to it. I bet that took a lot for you not to do it. Congrats on not giving in to the booze!! Also, I bet you will feel much better about yourself in the morning for not doing it. Imagine how you would feel waking up knowing that you just threw away all the time and effort that you put into not drinking for one night. It is a lot easier said than done of course but quite frankly when I decide that I can just have that "one night of drinking" and then I would be able to quit again for a while like it was nothing.. like a normal person so to say... I feel like shit the next morning for doing it and then I start craving it again and again... I believe you did the right thing and I hope you believe it too!!! One more thing that "TLH" wrote to me one time... what he does is when he gets the urge to go and drink he then waits an hour and see if the urge is still as strong... sometimes he gets distracted and forgets by the time the hour rolls around because hes caught up with something else... if you still have the urge in an hour wait another hour to see if you still want one etc... ("TLH") if I have this wrong please correct me! however this does work for me so far... kind of stole his idea to help me out :) but it is helping!!! Great job again!!
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"Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn't"
In the early days of not drinking my mind would always go back to taking a drink. But, with the help of AA, meetings and my sponsor, I didn't take that first drink. And, to my amazement, it really did get better.
I always try to remind myself that I am doing this 'just for today'. And, keeping myself busy helps.
Hang in there, won't you? Please let us know how it is going for you.
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
yes, 'that's what alcoholics do - if we are not drinking we are thinking about drinking' even those who know they consciously don't want to drink constantly having the topic of drinking on their minds. There are brain pathways that are establishe and permanent, and there are triggers to these pathways. You mentioned that you were with your sister, and that you usually drink together. This triggered that pathway,,, sister - drink - want one.
What the 12 Step program does is to establish new pathways, as TLH's concept implies. As soon as we get triggered and feel that impulse, put it on 'hold' and try to find something else to do, whether with that same person, or somewhere else.
It is just super important for you baby that you do not drink or smoke. Priority number 1. Perhaps you can be honest with your sister about your decision to not drink? and perhaps she can help in the effort to find new things for you two to do together?
My sister and I used to drink together too. And I'm the one that got her started on smoking. I sooo regret both.
Just ideas, not 'advice'.. You must do what you think will work.
God bless you,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
I am so with you on that one. I am going out tonight to see some music and then going to a club night...maybe foolish but it's what I like to do and sitting at home just depresses me if I do it all the time. So I have been thinking all week...can I have a glass of wine with a friend before we go out, and will that be ok, etc etc etc. But I did go to a f2f meeting last night and I got home and wrote a big list of the reasons why I drink, and surprisingly having a good time didn't feature too highly...so I am going to read that before my friend comes over tonight and going to read one of the 24 hour thoughts for the day as I find them really good as something really quick to do on a daily basis.
And I'm also feeling pretty stink that I have a friend coming over and I don't even have a drink to offer her as I have none in the house, and I know she would normally drink wine... a small thing but something that I'll have to adjust to I guess.
I was also thinking that maybe I could think of some really exciting non alcoholic drinks to make - maybe with your sister? Some sort of mocktail, I don't know, something that's festive but harmless...
