Long story short......I was 'socializing' a couple days back.....was with a friends and their friends. I kept being offered "a drink". After 1000's of no thank yous, finally just smiled and said "I'm an alcoholic, I don't drink anymore". A guy friend of a friend of a friend of a friend spouted up, with beer in hand, and said "I used to be an alcoholic!!!" ........after having a brief conversation with him, he concluded to me that he was an AA member for years, decided he could control it and went back to 'controlled drinking' a few years ago....he says he still works the program daily, just not the part about abstinence.....He had a timer on his watch and I dont' know how long but if he finished a beer before the timer went off he didn't open another until it did! And his empty cans were lined neatly on the counter so he could keep track....He was not "out of hand" nor 'drunk' during the time I was around him which was several hours...........I found myself pissed off at him for LOTS of reasons.......His friends said he has never, since leaving AA, gotten "out of control"...........I called BS bcause I know most times for me it wasn't HOW much I drank, but how I felt afterward and thought 'only a matter of time' but then thought who am I to judge.......Your take?????
-- Edited by Doll at 06:19, 2007-01-10
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
i know a couple of people like that, they're in my family...what they dont tell u is about the road side suspension for drunk driving or locking themselves out of there house or the millions of other things that happen when your mind is fogged with alcohol. one of the persons i know greatly increased pain meds cause without booze to deal with her "stuff" she has switched addictions. that happens a lot too. you do not get the full story from people who claim to "control" it. and i have also noticed that they spend their whole life focused on controlling it...not exactly normal ! doesnt leave room for much else! and like phil says its only a matter of time before the shit hits the fan. you witnessed the cunning, baffleing and powerful nature of the disease in watching that guy.
I have to say that "my hat's off to him." I have a brother-in-law who can pick up a pack or two of smokes, smoke them in a couple or few days, and then not buy any for months. I can't. Nor can I drink "like a normal person". I have been trying to prove to myself that I could for the last dozen years with a year sober here, a couple months there, a few months there again (my five months yesterday((again))) Maybe the excrement WILL contact the air circulator, maybe not. Maybe he'll get sober again when he leaves that circle of friends, maybe not. As Cindy said...who needs the collateral crap with the DUI's, etc. Not me anymore. Life is too good/messy enough without having to add to it. My take...Tim
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"We posess the eyes through which the universe gazes with wonder upon its own majesty."
Thanks for the thoughts........I'm still processing this one.......My mind keeps going to the BB 4th Edition story of the woman who "did not enjoy her drinking when she controlled it"...Curiousity got the best of me, so I did a little asking 'around'. He never had a DUI, lost a job, family, yada, yada before AA, nor has he been thru any of this since he started practing controlled drinking. According to his WIFE, he's been doing it for about 5 yrs now.....Cunning and baffling - definately..........I found I actually wondered at one point, is he REALLY an alcoholic..........anyway, just food for thought. Thanks again for the responses.....Amazes me what we encounter in life, sometimes.
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Doll wrote: He had a timer on his watch and I dont' know how long but if he finished a beer before the timer went off he didn't open another until it did! And his empty cans were lined neatly on the counter so he could keep track....
I think I'm going to keep this post bookmarked as an exemplary definition of "a mental obsession with alcohol".
I did a lot of things like this in my drinking days, maybe not quite so organized about it. It may have kept me out of trouble at times, but it didn't make me any less of an alcoholic.
