2nd Question about defining an alcoholic

Frenzle · Member

2nd Question about defining an alcoholic

Quetzal · MIP Old Timer

Hi Frenzle,

I would decide to stop drinking for a few days at a time. I could always manage it, complete with varied moods and bad sleep. But, the trouble, for me, was staying stopped. I was always mentally obsessing about when I would have that next drink.

But, I knew in my heart, that I was an alcoholic and had to stay stopped if I wasn't going to kill myself. Even if it wasn't the amount that I drank, I always hated how I felt about myself afterwards.

Thank God, that has been removed for me since I started back with AA.

Take care,

Carol

shaun · Member

hi frenzle,i have been asked this question before,do you think im an alcoholic????and like you there confused and worried.

For me it was easy,i just didnt drink like other people anymore but by the time id realized and washed away the denial my life empty of all the people i loved and more.

If friends ask me about their drinking and alcoholism,i tend to say"if your worried stop".then if you manage that great,now stay stopped.If they cant, i do what other people did for me and take them to there first AA meeting.

One of the biggest lies my head would tell me was "life will be empty,boring and glum without booze.

For me,life has got so so so much better.A day at a time life is great and so much easier without alcohol.

Do keep coming back.

cooncatbob · Senior Member

Only alcoholics ask such questions. Sounds like someones looking for the easier softer way. When alcohol causes problems for a normal person they quit drinking, the alcoholic either ignores the problem or goes to great lengths to work around it.
I suggest that you read the first part of the book Alcoholics Anonymous, written by drunks about drunks. Hope this helps. Bob.

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Frenzle wrote:

Do you think an alcoholic can chose to not drink for a few days and not have a problem with doing so even if they have been drinking every day for many years.

Better elaberation:To experience varied temperament for the first few days and also sweating during sleep for the first few nights of not drinking but to not have any problem with deciding not to drink for those days.

-- Edited by Frenzle at 15:36, 2006-12-13

I sure do. I was a 'binge' drinker, so I went for 3-5 days between drinking usually anyway, however when I made the 'choice' to 'stop' I'd sometimes 'make it' up to 10 days before the disease took back over or the DT's started......Alcoholics are only unique to a very slight point. In the end, we can always identify with another in some way, shape or form.

Zster · Veteran Member

No offense, but to feel any physical effects (temperment change, night sweats) from not drinking does not sound like "quit with no problem" to me.

I had trouble really accepting that I could be truly alcoholic - even up to 8 months after my last 1st drink. To avoid unwanted questions an peer pressure from my French bosses, I woudl allow them to pour me a taste of wine, but would not drink it. On one visit I actually got a whiff of the wine across the restaurant table. It made me transiently dizzy as I remembered what that first warm sip can do.

For two weeks, every day, I obsessed on thinking about drinking and had to white knuckle it to keep from picking up again, after having not for months. Non-alcoholics simply do not do this, They can take it or leave it without a thought or any physical effects.

Trust me, I now believe that I am a dies in the wool alki!

The other posters are right - unbelievable as it wounds now, one can and will enjoy life again, without drinking. Music can still sound good (better), food can taste better, hanging with friends can last longer and sweeter, and miss those daily AM hangovers? Not in your life!

Best of luck, friend.

Ironman · Senior Member

I tried to do the same thing, and guess what? I could! But then I get right back on it on the weekends or other times I could justify it. Night sweats were common durning the week when not drinking.

Only you can tell yourself you are alcoholic.

I'm slightly different in that I hardly ever got smashed or did embarassing things. I've blacked out maybe 2 times. When drinking I could stop at night and turn over to water, then crash out. In other words I didn't drink til I passed out, and I almost always made a concious decision to have the last one, but that was always a double handed count. I always surpassed 5 beers. I drank for effect, not taste. I drank to run from problems. I drank to help me mow the lawn. I drank when I feel sorry for myself. I drank when I'm feeling good about something.

Why do you drink?

Tell us your story, and we can help.

Frenzle · Member

Zster wrote:

No offense, but to feel any physical effects (temperment change, night sweats) from not drinking does not sound like "quit with no problem" to me.

I had trouble really accepting that I could be truly alcoholic - even up to 8 months after my last 1st drink. To avoid unwanted questions an peer pressure from my French bosses, I woudl allow them to pour me a taste of wine, but would not drink it. On one visit I actually got a whiff of the wine across the restaurant table. It made me transiently dizzy as I remembered what that first warm sip can do.

For two weeks, every day, I obsessed on thinking about drinking and had to white knuckle it to keep from picking up again, after having not for months. Non-alcoholics simply do not do this, They can take it or leave it without a thought or any physical effects.

Trust me, I now believe that I am a dies in the wool alki!

The other posters are right - unbelievable as it wounds now, one can and will enjoy life again, without drinking. Music can still sound good (better), food can taste better, hanging with friends can last longer and sweeter, and miss those daily AM hangovers? Not in your life!

Best of luck, friend.

By quit with no problem I mean to not drink without any real desire to drink. To go several days without even wanting a drink. For it to be easy to go without a drink to the point that the idea hardly crosses the mind for that time, though with the physical withdrawls of sleep sweats and varied temperament. To then even drink over the following weekend then just as easily stop again for the rest of the week without any urges and at this point to not experience any sweats etc?

-- Edited by Frenzle at 10:26, 2006-12-15

Sick of being sick · MIP Old Timer

Try going 6 months without a drink....that's not a very long time.....Or is it???? If you answer that you couldn't go that long without a drink, welcome to the clan.

If you say "no problem", as you should, then do it. If you can't go even 6 measly little months without drinking alcohol,......c'mon!'" Let"s take another measurement.
..it's such a VERY short time in a lifetime.... can you reallly do it? If you are even wondering about the answer, you NEED alcohol...... If you are an alcoholic, you can never again "drink normally".

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Frenzle wrote:

By quit with no problem I mean to not drink without any real desire to drink. To go several days without even wanting a drink. For it to be easy to go without a drink to the point that the idea hardly crosses the mind for that time........

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your key words to me are " several days - for that time", that is exactly what I did, that is why I label myself a "binge drinker"

Problem started for me when those several days were up! I never knew how many days were going to pass before the craving took over again.

Alcoholism is progressive. In the beginning of my alcoholic career the days of not drinking were many. As time moved forward the days between became shorter until I progesssed to a couple times a week mostly, (but not always). Had I continued to drink, I could very well be a 'daily drinker' today.......For me it mostly wasn't how often I drank it was the way I drank, how much I drank and the feelings that came after.

-- Edited by Doll at 06:00, 2006-12-15

sheilasdad · Senior Member

By quit with no problem I mean to not drink without any real desire to drink. To go several days without even wanting a drink. For it to be easy to go without a drink to the point that the idea hardly crosses the mind for that time........

For me it was really easy to go for several days, even nearly a week sometimes without wanting a drink. Usually that was after a prodigious bender. Believe me, the last thing I wanted was a drink after some of those twisters. Problem was, the weekend would come around, and even though I hadn't thought of drinking, even though I didn't need a drink, Johnny Jameson would start whispering in my ear...C'mon, Mike, just a couple... you can handle it." Then it was off to the races again. We call it the built-in forgetter. You forget the benders. You forget the insanity. You think you can handle it. Yeah, right.

I keep spotting grammatical errors... and I teach English!

-- Edited by sheilasdad at 17:10, 2006-12-15

-- Edited by sheilasdad at 17:12, 2006-12-15

Dave Harm · Senior Member

There are a million and one different test's to define what (and who) is an alcoholic.

I like one question - which answered honestly - will give you the answer. No reasoning to the question - just yes or no.

Has your drinking ever caused someone to shed a tear? YES or NO

Drinking is meant to be a fun and social event. If a person's drinking causes pain and tears - the it's a problem. My ex-wife, my kids, my co-workers, neighbors, friends - they shed many tears because of my drinking. Tears to fill many five gallon buckets. It was the pain that I caused others through my drinking that made me realize that - yes indeed - I am an alcoholic.

creating dreams, from the nightmares of hell...

mikey50 · Senior Member

For... me if i was not drinking... i was thinking about it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here are some of the methods we have tried;Drinking only beer

Limiting the number of drinks,never drinking alone,never drinking in the morning,drinking only at home,,never having it the house,never drinking during business hours,,drinking only parties..switching from scotch to brandy,,drinking only natural wines,,agreeing to resighn if ever drunk on the job,,taking a trip,,not takin a trip,,swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath),taking more physical exercise,,reading inspirational books,going to health farms and sanitariums ,,accepting voluntary commitment to asylums- we could increase the list ad infinitum.....only you can deside if you are one

Thank's