I opened up to my sponsor today... told her how I've been feeling... one of my alters apparently called her before I talked to her today and told her all this, what's going on with me. I also told her about being addicted to sleeping pills, and she said because of that I'm not sober...
She's suggesting treatment... and if I don't go, I'll have to make a big lifestyle change. She's also telling me I need to get up earlier and go to noon meetings, which I know is right. She said I need 2 meetings a day.
I left a message for my pdoc, he's calling tonight, and asking him about tapering off the sleeping pills... and I'll cut out caffiene in the afternoons and try to get up earlier so I can sleep at night.
I don't know how I feel about going into treatment... it scares me... but she said I may not have the discipline to change things in my life right now.
Well Lisa? I guess it all comes down to...."I can say that I havent had a drink in X amount of days..." and that in itself is a big plus..
But Living Sober is another story....and the "How much better do YOU WANT TO GET?"
I wont share with you..how long it has taken this kid...to get better...It would likely blow your mind...Everything Ive learned in AA Ive learned through the "School of hard knocks"..and I dont wish that route on anyone....
You dont hafta go that route...Your choice ..Your life...Your call...
And yes...Change is scary....Everythings a risk....but some are positive risks...
Hang Tough....
Do what you gotta do, for you....Do what you WANNA DO FOR YOU...
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"LOVE" devoid of self-gratification, is in essence, the will, to the greatest good...of another.
Addicts are prone to "trading one addiction for another" it's a fact! My sponsor believes that to be completely 'sober' means to be completely 'clean', free of anything that impairs us in anyway. Not everyone agrees with that......... If the sleeping pills are being 'abused' as you stated in your other post, then I believe that you do have a problem and need to seek seperate treatment for it, IF you so desire to be free of them....... For some of us, as time goes on, just not drinking is not enough...........Bottom line; IMHO, Do what you must for you and screw what everyone else says........... Keep working your program to the best of your ability and more will continue to be revealed to you, and then you will know what is the next right thing to do.......
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Do what you gotta do, for you....Do what you WANNA DO FOR YOU...
This is a selfish program and you have to want to do it for you and only you. It can't be done for anyone else but you and we are here for you but we can't do it for you. I know you are trying hard and I applaude you for that. As Doll said that we trade one addiction for another - well - I traded alcohol for worry to much so now I have to take ulcer medication and mind you I am not one for taking pills. When I was having sleeping problems my doctor said to use gravol because the side effects of gravol is sleepiness - they are not addictive - they are not very expensive (in Canada) and they work. My prayers are with you. Just my share at this moment in time
Later Jeannie
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You only live once; but if you work it right, once is enough. There is nothing better than the encouragement of a good friend.
some people dont consider me sober cause i take meds and one of them is a sleeping pill. i go to a doctor that is very knowledgeable about addiction, my meds are strictly monitored , which i like. its a touchy issue in the program. my take is if you're not a doctor then dont talk about what you dont know about. at least not to me. took me years to accept that i needed to be on meds for mental health issues, always thought the 12 steps could fix everything but apparently not. hope you dont have to take the hard road and have a good doctor. god bless.
