After ruining a number of relationships due to alcoholism, I have come here to let people know I feel awful, but find myself unable to feel remorse for my drinking problem and don't know where to turn.
I can remember when I drank all those feelings were buried pretty deep...
Most of the time I had to keep drinking...just to keep them buried...
When I got sober a lot of the pile came to the surface...and I just put a lot of it behind walls....until the time came that I could no longer live with it all...
Thats another story...
So...Whatcha lookin for our freind?
Would the following have anything to do with it..??
"We admitted that we were powerless over alcohol..that our lives had become unmanagable"
About 13 posts below is a page that might help..:) Step One...
-- Edited by Phil at 16:35, 2006-11-01
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"LOVE" devoid of self-gratification, is in essence, the will, to the greatest good...of another.
Hi Cynthia, welcome to MIP. I'd say if youre feeling awful, that's a form of remorse. I never really felt bad about my drinking, under the delusion that "my body, my business", not looking at how I was impacting others with it. But, the short of it was, the only thing I do feel remorse for now is for the pain I caused those who love me, and for the years I lost the spiritual part of myself. Having had no respect for myself, of course I didn't care what I did to "me".
The Steps and the program of AA gave me back my self respect, even my dignity, and how to love myself enough to feel remorse for hurting me. Guilt is a booger, but losing all self respect and honor was hell. But given a chance, you can gain it back. Think about what you truly deserve, and come to terms with the reality that you deserve better than what you're giving yourself right now. It's about freedom, and there's no freedom when you're practicing, no matter what you tell yourself. Please come back, Chris
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"Never argue with an idiot... They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience..."
