This was brought up in a meeting. I looked up the definitions:
IDENTIFY: To recognize or establish as being a particular person or thing;
COMPARE: to examine (two or more objects, ideas, people, etc.) in order to note similarities and differences
Can someone elaborate on this? I think I compare a lot. I had a handicapped child & always felt bad when around other mothers with normal kids, etc. I find that I do it a lot in other areas of my life.
I understand that comparing always puts me in the category of “less than.” But what does it mean to identify?
uh boy.....just a sec...gotta find the "On" switch...:)
To Compare with another is to judge their actions.. their thoughts...the things they have been through...what they have or havent got..etc..in comparison to ourselves..as in putting others down to build us up..or visa versa...
Or as in "Oh! I was never that bad" or " Man! I was worse than that!!" or "God!! Are they sick!!" compared to myself....the list goes on...and it can be a big ego thing...or a shame thing...
If I'm identifying with someone...I'm in tune with how they feel, and their emotions...the isms...and in tune with what they are sharing from within...
Thats all I got....gotta put in new batteries...
Have a good day in grapefruit country...
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"LOVE" devoid of self-gratification, is in essence, the will, to the greatest good...of another.
I worked to live by this when I first got clean because I was so sick and this is a wonderful reminder for me. When I would listen at meetings I would listen to the experience, strength and hope and see where I had some similarities. My self-esteem was so low that when I would believe I was better than or worse than or shame myself I would lose the whole point of the meeting.
It's like you comparing yourself to other mother's with children that had no disabilities. Most likely you felt inadequate in some way. Now if you were with other mother's with children with disabililities, maybe you would find support because people would share their journey and struggles and triumphs. To Indentify is like finding something that is similar to your own experience, belief system or hope to come. It finding something to relate to..........not to shame or be better than as Phil said.
This was an awesome question, it reminds me to identify rather than compare. Thank you. Have a good day.
Sincerely, Jo
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I granted myself the gift of sobriety and found my spirit.
