Hi Toni and thanks for asking. Well, I did manage to cut it back to only 50 hours last week. I think that is a little more managable than 60(+). Gotta watch out for that. Can't put success or failure of the business ahead of sobriety. Can't put ANYTHING ahead of sobriety!
Cindy, you said it well. My false sense of pride made me refuse for a long time to admit that I couldn't control my drinking. To me it was shameful admission of weakness. Funny though, how I didn't have as much trouble doing shameful and embarrassing things while drinking. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb!
Your post has reminded me of just how much pride I had when I was drinking. I refused to ask for anyone's help, but I knew that my alcoholism was killing me. Me and alcohol were and always will be a very dangerous combination. Looking back, for someone who had so little self-esteem I had a massive ego.
Have a great day.
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Your Post just made me smile, there is a saying that drinking alcoholics are "ego-maniacs with an inferiority complex". Go figure, eh. We are all in the Same little Boat, called Recovery, amazes me at the similarities that we all share.
ME and the truck. Hits and run, cop chases, trees, innocent civilians, I am astounded I am not in prison for manslaughter, or assault with a deadly weapon. To many incidents. Was God looking out for me, or the other poor asshole who got in my way?
Or a hot slitz.mixed with hot wild turkey while fishing in 95 degrees. BLAHHHHHHHH. A snippet of the type of conversation I never have to have again- ryan wakes up-gets up- shortly after- "WHAT THE F*%^!!!!" wife wakes up- "Oh BABEEE. You dont remember what you DID LAST NIGHT?"
heheheee brings back memories. did someone clean a deer in the kitchen, oh I just chopped my finger in half again. Opening a can of v8 with a kitchen knife. Why's the truck in the back yard? is that smoke? Who in the hell is this chick passed out in the living room? The neighbor. nice titties. Do I need to get her out before the wife wakes up? Or was it her idea in the first place? AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGG. It's good to be sober and halfway sane.