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Post Info TOPIC: What Is


MIP Old Timer

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What Is
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"… 'accepting' does not necessarily mean 'liking,'
'enjoying,' or 'condoning.' I can accept [the reality of]
what is -- and be determined to evolve from there.
It is not acceptance but denial that leaves me stuck."
-- Nathaniel Branden


The world is a palette of varied beauty with subtle and not-so-subtle differences in brilliance and hue. But, like all we perceive subjectively, many things can fail to meet our expectations. People don't behave as we'd wish them to, situations turn out differently than we'd imagined, and the end result is often unhappiness. The remedy is acceptance - an open-minded, understanding perception that brings the serenity of knowing every individual, situation, or difficulty is unique and valuable in some way. It is a mode of respect for differences, of seeing beyond faults or disappointments and reaching contentment.

Though acceptance necessitates recognizing and acknowledging situations or attitudes that exist in the present, it does not imply that you need also give your approval. To approve or to disapprove is to judge, but in accepting, you simply understand that all situations and all people are in a constant state of flux. Likewise, each of us is also in the process of changing and by choosing to accept ourselves (in the past, present, and future); we can truly begin to understand who we really are. Acceptance is freedom from the need to retain preconceived notions, control of others, favored outcomes, or the anxiety that can come when the unexpected occurs. It is more than tolerance, though resisting the urge to react to the choices of others is a large part of the process. Rather it is a patience and gentleness that extends outward, beginning in one's own soul and extending to other people and the world at large.

Sometimes the process works in reverse because accepting others can be easier than accepting oneself, though the latter is the inevitable result of true acceptance. In fostering acceptance, the need to judge is quelled because the belief that others ought to live up to your expectations (or 'should thinking') is eliminated because everything is evolving and deserves to do so without interference. And in letting growth happen and understanding that each person, place, thing, or situation is as it is meant to be, a blissful quiet of the mind and strong feelings of worth can be realized.



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"Never argue with an idiot... They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience..."



MIP Old Timer

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"understanding that each person, place, thing, or situation is as it is meant to be"


Dontcha just hate that line sometimes?? (smile)


 


All the Turkeys here, are out partying tonight...and ruffling their feathers...


More remember whens....



 
Have a good one eh....

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"LOVE" devoid of self-gratification, is in essence, the will, to the greatest good...of another.


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Hi Chris,


Use to plaster these notes to myself, in every room, on those little stick ums,  then think I gave up, or decided to go with it, sometimes it is one way, and then at times, it is the other.


What is..........................................................IS!


My two cents, on this subject,


Thanks Chris for this reminder.


So simple, but we Alkes can complicate just about anything, right? Like, yeah, but, yeah, BUT,  on and on. Learning the real meaning of Minding my own business through a Higher Power has helped this Alke, so much, it's all really in the Steps, nothing seems to be left out, regarding how to do Life on Life's terms.   We learn that we are truly Powerless over Alcohol, and THEN Slowly, we learn that we are Powerless over everything outside of our own bodies, and our own actions, just survived some of this stuff, and now here I am just sweeping up my side of the Street.


Toni



-- Edited by Toni Baloney at 22:23, 2006-10-07

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MIP Old Timer

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I like this share a lot. Often things happen, people happen, and I feel compelled to have an opinion about it. But I am not well-equipped to have an opinion about many things I face. I am not objective about most things in my own life. I am better off Accepting, and if anyone has an opinion, let it be my sponsor, or another alcoholic who has 'been there, done that'.


Wish this lesson were easy to learn.... :o)


Joni



-- Edited by jonibaloni at 09:01, 2006-10-08

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MIP Old Timer

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Hi Chris,

Thank you so much for such a thought provoking share. “People don't behave as we'd wish them to,” was always something that I would drink on. If a person didn't behave as I 'expected' them to, I would feel 'out of control' and turn to a drink for consolation.

I work very hard on a daily basis to truly accept things/people/events as they are and not as I would wish them to be.

Thank you for reminding me that I nearly always need to work a little harder.

Have a great weekend,

Carol

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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
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