Been having a tough time of things lately. Kind of came to two conclusions.
I'm coming up on six months in the program, sober. I've heard it said that with certain anniversaries it can be a major struggle. I've heard it said too many times by too many people to totally discount that one.
Depression. This one scares the hell out of me. It's okay to get down and out every once in a while. When it lasts a week or longer, that's what scares me. Total fear. I'm maxed out on Paxil which is for depression and social anxiety. If this problem persists I will have to change to a different medication. I've had some really trying times with changing meds in the past. This is where the fear is coming from. Don't want to do it, but if I have to I have to.
Anyways, it's been uneventful for me lately. That one incident with my co-worker was resolved Tuesday. He apologized to me first thing and I accepted his apology and said it takes two to tango and that I was sorry for my part of it! Progress......
LOLOLOLOLOL........ You come up with some CLASSICS, my friend!!!!
Justin, I really feel for you. While I am aware that you do have clinical diagnoses, don't forget that the process of recovery does also in fact lend itself to some times of depression, too. What's broke in the body, mind and life won't fix overnight, or even in 6 months. Please hang in there, my friend.
this too shall pass... this too shall pass... this too shall pass...
You are so very much in my thoughts right now. I'm so sorry that you are struggling with depression at the moment. I do hope that you will soon be coming out of the other side. But, try to look on the good things, such as the length of your sobriety. Well done!
As Joni said, this too will pass. It really will. Just hang in there. We're all with you.
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Hey there. I feel for you. I'm the heart of a deep depression right now. I was on Paxil for two years and they were absolutely wonderful for my panic attacks. But they didn't really help depression, so the doc just put me on Wellbutrin. I totally relate to the switching meds anxiety! I'm a med-o-phobic to the core. I hate the "unknown" of how meds will react to my body and mind. Scares me sh**less. But hang in there! You've made it six months--don't give up. Use your resources! (making mental note to do the same...)
It was my birthday on tuesday of two years without alcoholand I stayed away from aa, fear of looking crap for 2 years sober, fear fear fear.
The depression, yes I too suffer, im on max dose too... seems to gewt worse when it all hits the fan.
Wish I had got my chip now, worried I may fall off the "wagon" hope not, maybe I had been resentful at aa, because they allowed me to be picked on at my home group.
been going to different meetings but not sure about them, they are all too happy and it seems fake. not sure at all. I dont want to do another mans inventory. maybe they have what i need? or maybe they are nuts? who knows, im gonna hit the sack before any more rubbish spews out, I hope this made sense, it did to me..
anytime something continues to bother me for a long time after it has actually happened, it's time for me to do an inventory and find out just why I am so sensitive to it. I find that a lot of my current sensitivity comes from unresolved fears and self-pity from the past. Once the crap from the past is out of the way, it's easier to let today's stuff just 'roll off'.
Hope you keep on keepin on, Rob. You have made it through a lot!!
I hope you were able to get at least a little smile out of my cartoon earlier today.
I am manic/depressive (I have been resisting accepting any medication to this point, but some days I think I should not fight so hard against that. I have a sister who takes Zoloft, and my oldest daughter has been prescribed Prozac for years.)
I am sometimes up and sometimes down, with the majority of time emotionally flat line. I am actually most greatful for the time that I am flatline, because when I am feeling a little too emotionally high, I know that I am probably reaching the crest of the wave and about to head into the trough.
When I am down, I know I have to work hard at breaking the dark beast's hold on me. I try to find any of the funniest films, books, jokes, skits that I can get my hands on. I also try to focus on a kind of prayerful meditation, putting my lot in the hands of that all-encompassing force behind this universe. The former is my sword, and the latter, my shield against the dark monster.
Also, know that you have a group of people who care about you, and try to envision yourself wrapped in that love and caring.