I don't think so. My exabf called me a month ago and as we talked about our drinking he said that we were good drunks because nothing bad ever happened to us. I for one was not a good drunk. My bad behavior was of a more subtle and damaging kind. The kind that damaged myself and the people I loved.
He always thought I was good because I limited my drinking around my kids. Well that's true, I did, but it wasn't because I wasn't drinking. I was drinking, I just limited my time around the kids. That's not so good. But it's better now. My 14 year old actually let's me kiss her good night now and instead of saying "get away - you smell like beer!" she tells me she loves me too.
This is a great time in my life now. I'm starting to take an honest look at myself and even though it's hard I'm liking it. I can see now how much I've always looked to other people for approval. That's a big one for me. There's a lot of other things that are starting to come to the surface too. I would never have been able to face these things if I was still drinking.
So no, I was not a good drunk. Thanks for letting me share!
I don't think that there can ever be 'a good drunk'. When I was drinking I was too consumed by my desire for the next drink to have a relationship with anyone or anything other than the bottle. I was completely selfish and uncaring. It's only now that I am sober that I can begin to see just how I must have been - and I don't like it one bit. It serves to remind me, though, of just how bad those days were.
I'm so glad that your relationship with your daughter is getting better. That put a smile on my face this morning when I read that.
Take care and have a great day,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
My ex husband and I had that conversation once. I came to the conclusion that he didn't want me to get sober because as long as I was drinking "with him" it was OK for him to continue to drink.
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Well thats some sick rationalizin, huh? A good drunk. Heehee.
My ex bf after a relaspe commented to me about his daily pot smoking over at a dealers house...."its really no big deal, I just stop by, smoke a j, then go back to work or if work is slow, we just hang out and play darts" Thankfully he is back in the program and doing very well.
Thank God you are doing well and can see what your recovery is bringing to your life...honesty and a better relationship with your daughter among other things!
