Wow, Heather!! Light at the end of the tunnel, huh?? What a blessing that your dr. took into account what has been going on with you, and Kudos to you for being honest and up front with him/her (?) and not giving up or picking up. I admire your fighting spirit.

If the medication switch works for you, then with that and a program you should be in good hands, one day at a time. I know that for some reason, I could not get a foot hold on recovery until all issues were addressed, both alcoholic and mental challenges.

Good wishes coming your way, and nice idea in 'getting out of self'. I am truly grateful that my Alcoholism and my mood-stuff is highly treatable. Makes the outlook very positive to me. And know what? If I do ever 'come down with' something very serious, at least I will hopefully deal with it sober, as so many have.

Have a great night!! 

Joni 

Heather,

   Before I get to the specific reason for my responding to your post, let me say I'm a supporter of taking anti-depressant medication if one is truly chronically depressed.  I'm not sure I understand the thinking found in some recovery circles that taking doctor prescribed anti-depressants (assuming one takes them exactly as prescribed) is somehow counter to the program of true recovery.  Let those who spout that line of thinking live for a day or two in the head of a truly depressed person, and methinks they may have a new take on the subject.

  However, that wasn't my reason for responding.  It was the mention of Welbutrin,specifically, that caught my attention.  I have some experience with this drug, and with being an alcoholic, that may be of use to you.

   If you're anything like me, or like I have been, any drug, any pill, anything like that is a potential substance to be abused.  Or at least to be taken neglectfully.  PLEASE PLEASE be advised that Wellbutrin is a drug that MUST NOT BE TAKEN WITH ANY IRREGULARITY WHATSOEVER.  NOR SHOULD IT BE TAKEN IF YOU FALL BACK TO DRINKING.

     Three years ago, I made the same exact medicinal switch as you just have.  Discontinued use of Paxil, and was prescribed Welbutrin instead.

      First of all, I must say, the Welbutrin did in fact help tremendously with my formerly often crippling anxiety and self-consumption.  I must say, it truly did allow me a saner headspace.

       Anyway, being who I am, or at least had been, I, of course, couldn't (or wouldn't) just simply take one pill a day, and let that be that.  I'd accidentally miss two or three days, so then "make up for it" by swallowing down four five pills the next day...  Nothing too tremendously reckless (well, not for me, anyways), but still, certainly not as was being prescribed to me. 

       Also, I was still drinking... Not, at that point, every day I don't believe, but still, enough.

       And so, before three full months on Welbutrin had passed, I found myself, while chairing a very important production meeting, "waking up" to find an EMT standing over me with an oxygen mask pressed to my mouth.

        I had suffered an enormous and (apparently) terrifying to behold seizure.  Never had I any history with seizures, no family occurrences...  I had a devastating seizure due to semi-irregular usage of my Welburtin, probably helped on by consumption of alcohol.

         I have subsequently learned that seizures are a not entirely uncommon side effect of Welbutrin, EBVEN WHILE TAKEN AS PERSCRIBED AND WITHOUT USE OF ALCOHOL.  While that is clearly a minor percentage, the odds of a seizure rise INCREDIBLKY when alcohol and irregular usage of the drug are factored in.

         The seizure was no small matter.  It was quite powerful and potentially fatal, given the intensity of it.  (My doctor would be able to elaborate with more detail, pf course, but suffice to say, it was serious).

         I offer this up not as a righteous rebuke to taking welbutrin.  As I said, in the limited time I was using it as prescribed, the results seemed heartening.  I just BEG YOU to understand the risks associated with this drug and how much greater these risks become with problematic usage and drinking.  More than likely, you'll have no issues at all.  But, being an addict myself, I just know the tendencies that I wrestle with, and I just wanted to arm you with my experience should you find any of these things becoming an issue.

   Best of luck...  God Bless.

    Eric