Hi everyone - I've only posted once, about a month ago. Things were going very well (obviously, from the screen name I picked). Have been sober for over 2 months and blew it last night. No good reason just gave in to the craving I guess. I have no idea what made me convince myself that it was a good idea but I had a 100 rationalizations before I stopped at the store. The only good thing that came out of it was seeing so clearly that I am not the person I want to be when I drink. Today will be better.
Anyway, I've been wondering what "life on life's terms" means to people?
Glad to see you here and talking about your slip... incidentally, they say that the acronym for "SLIP" is Sobriety Loses It's Priority..
As for 'life on life's terms', it is about accepting things that are happeniong around us as 'the way it was meant to be'. It is kind of the opposite of accepting things ONLY if they turn out MY way, on my terms.
When I was drinking, I would only accept what I wanted to accept... a lot of stuff happened around me that I had no control over, and instead of accepting it and being at peace with it, I focused wholeheartedly on Changing things, Running everything I could, Manipulating people and events to no end... and when all my efforts were put in, and things STILL didn't go my way, I drank more. I was trying to exert power where I really had none.
So as I learn one day at a time how to accpet "Life on Life's Terms", I begin to be able to relax a bit more, and focus on changing myself so that no matter what LIFE is doing, I am OK and can remain sober. Hope this helps.
If you read my post below, entitled, "Uh Oh... should I worry?"... You will see that I had an unexpected experience that I simply just have to accept on life's terms today... I have to just be OK regardless, and not try to do anything to manage, fix, or repair something I cannot control. OI am so glad you posted here... I needed to read and respond to it for myself, as a reminder!! My Higher Power works in very awesome ways like that.
Hope you get back in the saddle, friend. And welcome to a new day of sonriety.
Please try not to worry too much about your slip. I did exactly the same thing as you. I had been sober for three months and then picked up again. But, I stopped after two glasses. I didn't want to go back there and to the way my life was. I did learn from the experience and I know that it helped to make me stronger. My sponsor strongly suggested that I shared at every meeting that I usually went to and that I did a few more, too. It really did help me enormously.
As to the meaning of life on life's terms ... You have made me think about that. Thank you for that. I guess that when I was drinking it was everything having to be on my terms or not at all. Now, I accept that I have absolutely no power over people, places or things and that I just have to accept them - as hard as that can sometimes be. I cannot change what life is going to throw at me, but I can work on changing myself and that's what helps to keep me sober.
Please take care and keep coming back, reading and posting, won't you?
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Have been sober for over 2 months and blew it last night. No good reason just gave in to the craving I guess. I have no idea what made me convince myself that it was a good idea
B/C alcoholics drink, plain and simple. Accepting that fact is "life on life's terms" for me. And with that acceptance comes Step One.
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
