why am I so fearful for a positive change in my life? I have been preying for this change, and it has come and I am now worried about the what if's - I am not happy where im at, so I am looking to leave all that behind me, but still I am worried....
I am currently in a similar situation. Change for me is scary. I have been FULL of fear for the past 3 weeks since I started this new job--which is better than the old one, more money, more responsibility, climbing the ladder so to speak. But any change for me causes fear and anxiety whether it's good change or bad. I talked to my sponsor and told her how uncomfortable I am and you know what she told me? PRAY!!! So that's what I am doing. That's all I can do. I REALLY REALLY HATE CHANGE!!!!! I just keep thinking of how people say if you walk through those feelings of fear eventually you come out on the other side and it's a great feeling. The light at the end of the tunnel.....Keep plugging along! I'll be thinking about you..........
I'm just the same as you hating change so much. It doesn't matter what the change is, I'm just really uncomfortable with it and worry about it so much. I checked it out recently on the internet and discovered that part of the human condition is to be fearful of any change. It made me feel a little better. But, it's something that I am working on on a daily basis. I still have a long way to go, though, but I'm glad that I'm aware of it and that I can do something about it.
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
I think for me, what makes change uncomfortable for me, is that old pessimism I had for so many years while drinking.... Voices and committees in my mind saying things like, "Whatever's going to happen now cannot possibly be good"... When I was drinking, that was right no target.
But not so, anymore!! How quickly I forget, I have a new 'director', a Higher Power in the driver's seat. I don't have to be afraid of change anymore. I can be excited about it, sometimes, if I let myself have faith.
have to scadoddle, and get out of house soon, but wanted to add my 2 cents.
Any major change on the Stress Charts is usually a 9 or 10, on a scale of 1 to 10, so when major changes are there, like your new job, just have to deal with the stressors that come with it. Fear is just a part of the stressor to me.
One thing I love to use, is that theory of Habituation. The saying goes that if you do something, anything 18 repetitive times, that you have habituated it, and can feel almost like second nature, as as example, if you have a nagging habit, you want to change, do it for 18 times, and then it will become second nature. have tried this on some old worn out habits i needed to change, and found that it really works.
Don't know if it applies to major changes, I think that would fall into the month or so catagory, when the change will not feel new any longer, you are home free.
When the word "Change" comes up, I too resist it. Conditioning over the years has made me view change as " upheaval", taking me away from my safety. So, if I know change is coming? I start thinking of it as either Adventure or Journey. I will replace the word over and over, and for me, that works. If I just replace one word that I feel negative about with one that has positive connotations for me, it makes all the difference in the world. I mean, who doesn't want to have an adventure? or go on a spiritual or life journey? So with me, I play word games. Once I begin to feel excited, I begin to see positive, neat things in what it going to occur. Anyway, this helps me....and you've alot of people who will love you right thru these tensions and fears. A big hug, Wren
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i found god in myself/and I loved her/i loved her fiercely--Ntozake Shange
