Hi there WRBB. Just wanted you to know that I am still working on my first draft. When it comes to telling my story, I sometimes feel that it would make excellent bedtime reading, cause most people would fall asleep after the first paragraph!
The short story though, is that my life reached a point (after about a 35 year love affair with ethyl [alcohol]) where I was no longer consuming the booze, it was consuming me! Had to get off that train, cause I could see the cement truck stalled on the tracks ahead. (I am sure that Phil will tell you what I saw was really a turnip truck! )
I also knew that I needed encouragement and support to make that happen. Those two words, to me, are at the heart of what this MIP board is all about.
So now, I am slowly turning my life and my health around. No blinding flash, but miracles that sneak up on you slowly should not be mistaken as any less than the thunder from the heavens kind.
May Peace, Love & Tranquility bless your recovery (along with a generous seasoning of Joy)
alright, the www. i'll give this a shot, though i do this usually at the podium,first time in this format......i was raised in a family where drugs and alcohol have been abused for generations on both sides. lot of abuse when i was a kid. came into recovery in my late 20s , had huge trust issues. one effect of that was i would not accept a ride from any one to meetings so i walked about a five mile radius to all the meetings in my area almost every day for the first year. [really helped restore my health] i am going to have to keep this short,cause i'm finding this much more difficult to write down than talking at a meeting. soo basically recovery has been a struggle, thank god for the old timers who never lost patience with me, i was angry and volatile for a long time so lots of meetings went to a treatment centre lots of councilling ,therapy ect. for issues. i have a few really amazing wonderful friends in recovery. they are more family to me than blood relatives ever have been. i am a single parent off a 12 year old son. lately i've been doing a lot of work on p.t.s.d. and clinical depression. been pretty stable [for me] for a month now. the storm seems to be passing and i have huge gratitude. i wouldnt be alive if wasnt for program and the support from my few trusted" sisters" in recovery. anyways thats the best i can do, just want to say again, welcome. hope you like it here.
um...hmmmm....been there...done that....almost died before giving up...and Im here... cause Im not all there.....and there are still a few parts missing and a few screws loose...so I hafta keep commin..:)
The stuff in between? There just isnt enough time...or enough paper...and I type with one finger..:)
You have a nice day...eh..
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Life is short..Live it sober to the fullest...One day at a time...
Thank you for sharing. My sponsor always tells me to tell my story every time I get a chance. It helps me remember. For the most part, I feel my drunkolog is not important. I like to focus on recovery and what I can do today. Whatever that saying is about yesterday is overand tomorow is yet to come, or something like that, is a good one.
It is great that you are raising your son in recovery. I have two kids and I see the program working through them all the time. I am very grateful for that. Sometimes at night my 10 year old daughter will do a step 10 on me (or vice versa) and she doesn't really realize that is the program in action. I love the honesty it has brought to my family and the awareness that we are not perfect. I do not have to be a perfect Mom and I don't have to pretend I am always right (this is how I likely would have behaved if I were still drinking). It is a relief.
Anyway, just wanted to say thanks for sharing and take care. Hope you have a good day.
Hi everyone. I'm Jennifer and I'm an alcoholic. This is my WWW (as WR puts it...I kinda like that!)
I am 32 years old, married with one daughter who is 9. I started drinking when I was 12. I remember the first time and I really loved it. It made me "a part of" something like I had never felt before. I drank until I threw up and then wanted to do it again. I can't ever remember a time when I didn't drink until the booze was gone or I got drunk enough to pass out. I don't know what "social drinking" is. I drank to become social.
My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. were or still are drinkers. My mom and dad divorced just before I turned 12. My brother and I lived with my dad. My mom moved out and got a job for the first time in her life and left us with him. He was wonderful and loving but drank heavily. I can recall many times I would ask my dad for money or if I could go somewhere while he was passed out on the couch. Lots of freedom for a teenager. Freedom for me to drink, drug and whatever else I wanted to try.
When I met my husband we both stopped drinking and drugging. For a while things were good but then we decided that all of our friends were doing it so why shouldn't we also have a good time? We had the party house. Pool table, bar, refrigerated keg in the basement. Boy were we popular now!! After a few years of this we decided to start a family. That would settle us down right? Well, I didn't drink while I was pregnant but after she was born I started up again. My husban hadn't quit drinking and going partying so why should I have to? I ended up drinking alone at home many many times. Just waiting and stewing about how pissed I was at him for leaving me at home all the time with the baby.
My drinking got worse and worse. I drank daily for a while and tried to stop. Then tried to moderate and control my drinking. This went on for about 4 years. The longest I could stay dry was 7 weeks and it was pure hell.
I finally decided that I should try AA. I went to meetings but kept on drinking for a couple months. Then I got to a point where I couldn't do it anymore. I called a woman on one of my AA lists and she offered to sponsor me. I said "Yes, I'll do ANYTHING!!!" I started working the steps with her guidance and was sober for 41/2 months then relapsed. I called her and she said "Do you still want to get sober?" And I said YES. So we are working through things and I am trying to get in touch with My higher power so that I can stay sober.
It has been 4 weeks since my last drink. I am putting all of my energy into my recovery today. If I feel like drinking I call my sponsor, go to a meeting, call another alcoholic. I pray morning and night and I am starting to feel like my higher power is here with me.
The only place today that I feel comfortable in my own skin is in a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. They have been there for me and given me hope for these past few weeks. I am on the road to recovery again and I am happy. I never though I would be able to feel "a part of" again once I stopped drinking. But I do. I am a part of Alcoholics Anonymous. And I am grateful for that....Thank you all for being here and letting me tell my story.
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