Toni, Phil, Iffer, Soberdrunk, Robert, Rob---so many of you that mean so much to me. I only wanted to be here to share how I've stayed sober, one day at a time. I wanted to help the new comer. I wanted to support and share with those of us who have been around for awhile. There is a person on this board who needs to be the center of attention. She has spent years zeroing in on one person at a time to alienate. Usually, I can just ignore her. but when I post about something that has helped me spiritually, and I get a bunch of religious philosophy shoved in my face, and turned around and bent to boot, with veiled nastiness---I give. I feel I have alot to give to alot of people. And that people here have alot I can learn. but I cannot do it when every thing I post is set upon to be either negated, or have an insecure ego play "one up-man-ship". I have felt true pity for this person, cuz she must be damned lonely to spend her time cyber stalking, but, I do have a life, I do have friends, I do have a program, and most importantly, I have my spirituality, and that just isn't up for contention. Most of you have my email addy, use it. Toni has my phone number. You are welcome to use it. I will sorely miss you, but shoot, this has just gotten beyone stupid.
(Name Omitted by Admin), another ego notch on your belt for chasing one more person who truly cares, away. Stay sober. Go to meetings. Good luck.
When the circumstances change, let me know, I'll be happy to come back--wren
-- Edited by Wren at 20:42, 2006-05-18
-- Edited by John at 03:23, 2006-05-19
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Funny, isn't it, how friends and a Power greater than ourselves can neutralize nightmares?
Yup...thats been the story for quite a while here ...Wren...
Ive reacted more than once over it ....and gotten nowhere....
I thought about packing it in a few times....but Im still here....for myself, and for the newcommer...and trying to ignore the drama....
Its something like....
If a person keeps comming to the same meeting day after day...and disrupting the whole meeting continuously...and upsetting everyone..with their opinionated remarks...religion..and private chats in the corner..They are going to be asked to leave...It would not be tolerated....
Yet the subject has been brought to others attention.,,many times..and still nothing is done about it...
There have been many that have left this board, over the past while...including newcommers..
Its sad to see...
I hope you stay with us...for the newcommer...and those that reach out for help...
But I personally understand, and respect your decision..if you dont...
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Life is short..Live it sober to the fullest...One day at a time...
I do not get it, either, this disruptive stuff would never be allowed to go on in any meeting I have ever been to. When we do not allow people to speak their own minds, without confrontation and debate, they suffocate our voices, and that is not what A. A. is about. In my home meetings in the Bay area, it was a real Strong point, that in every meeting it was annouced that there will be no "cross-talk". Most alcoholics are Recovering from very old and deeply ingrained co-dependency issues, and this exercise of never speaking about what others had to say, was a real growing experience to me.
This MIP Board does have a very open and mostly loving way of letting us share the the topic, and our own particular views, here, which as opposed to "no cross- talk" can be very theraputic. Thats is just my take here, we try to follow the guidelines of A.A. sharing our experience, strengh and hope here with people we know, and watch this Board come so alive, with the new person, and as John said once, it maybe their only chance at ever seeing into the How the Program of Alcoholic Anonymous works and needs to stay conflict free all the time, in order for that to happen. We all know by heart that this a life or death Disease. There has never been a Conflict on that.
I have seen others say, oh well, this stuff just goes on here once in a while, but I feel once in a while is too often, to me, that may be the day that some new person is Reading, and watching, and then, if it is one of these days, chances are up for grabs that they will return. Sad, way more than sad, tragic.
Remembering back to our first A.A. meeting, can you imagine watching someone go after another with a debate of their preception. Challenging everything the other would say. Suffocating the air that we breath.
So, time for me to take a little break as well, this is the third time I have observed such conflict since December of last year, and it is only May. Three times in 5 months is three times too many.
So, so sorry if you are leaving, but we will be in touch for sure. Your years of Recovery have brought with them so much growth, and such a great understanding of Alcoholics Anonymous, and the Heart of the Program, which is Love of our fellow alcoholics still suffering, in and out of this Program and Recovery Forum.
God Bless you Chris, and thank you for all the Brightness and Cheer and Intregity you have brought to this Board, you will be missed, by most of us. It is one thing to share, and quite another to Debate, we no longer debate, have retired from the Debating Society, Right????
Phil and Toni Bolani have been given message board admin privledges while allow them to edit or delete post, and ban users.
I would like to offer the same ability to Wren and a few others, so that this one person no longer has the ability to control or manipulate our board members to such a degree that leaving the board is a the only viable solution they have...
The ability to single out individuals for what does appear to be nothing more than cyber stalking, is not acceptable behavior on this board. Therefore, I am seeking at least 5 strong board members, with substantial sobriety time, to give monitoring status to, and thus take the power to chase people off this board from those that tend to do so, whether with or without intent.
I have given two members admin status, Phil and Toni Baloni, and offered it to Wren, I am seeking two more that would make good monitors...any suggestions for who should be able to do this is appreciated.
I don't actually understand what all this means, and I only read wrens post.
I hope (but do not think) this has anything to do with me does it?
I know that I have come back here bleating on about what happen to me and didn't really see such a great connection with AA, but I do honestly hope I haven't done anything wrong??
Gee, am I am alcoholic or what? The whole egomaniac with an inferiority complex at it's best. It's all about me and it's all bad. So immediately my first thought was the same as Flumpy's..."Is it me??"
I really hope you take John's offer and don't leave this board. Your posts have been such a help to me and many others I'm sure. You would be sorely missed..... I understand your frustration but I have to tell you that for me, I take what I need in the present moment and guiltlessly leave all the rest........
I just wanted to pass on...that its a we thing on this board..and we all care for each other equally...There is none of us..including myself..that wish to have any type of control..in any form...
Its a place where we can all come and share...without having to fear reprisal..or critiscm..of any kind..
To all of you that share on the board...if you would like to be a part of the monitoring system...please submit your name to John...and we will all make this a safe recovery place for ourselves..and for newcommers...with experience, strength, hope, and love.
You all have a great day....and thanks for being for here for this alcoholic...one day at a time..
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Life is short..Live it sober to the fullest...One day at a time...
I agree with Phil. And I know for me, in order to share with an open heart, I need to feel like this is a safe place to do so, without having to worry about it causing conflict. Alot of us have come from some pretty messed up places, where fear governed us, our actions and our words. It shouldn't need to be that way here. This is where we all pull together, reach out, and share our experiences, our hearts, and our strengths and hopes. And to parrot Phil, thank you for being here for this alcoholic also. Blessings, Wren (check it out, I'm a newbie again, LOL)
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i found god in myself/and I loved her/i loved her fiercely--Ntozake Shange
I understand your frustration but I have to tell you that for me, I take what I need in the present moment and guiltlessly leave all the rest........