I didnt know if i was gona go to meeting tonight, infact i probably wouldnt have.. But this morning at t-braek my mobile rang, made me jump,.. it was Alan, asking how i was and if i was going to meeting tonight.. i said "err.. yeah..maybe... " he said good and hed see me there.. and wished me a good day..
I think that call is really what made me go tonight... I spoke to Alan when i got there, told him id had a really shit weekend, he asked me what happpend i told him... He told me that no one would think bad of me nomatter how i was doing.. that people would just be pleased to see me here.. When i told him i was drinking friday but got a taxi n went to a meeting on friday he looked pleased/glad .
I found a seat, a women said "hello robert", she rememberd me from other meeting introduced herself and askd how i was.. Another women infront of me leant over and said shed seen me but couldnt rem my name.. askd how i was doing, how many meetings id done and if they were helping... she said it was good that i am gettin the meetings in.. introduced me to another women..
A guy ..another Alan did the talk, shared his story.. very powerful sort of guy, .. expressed it in a kinda passionate, almost aggressive though not if you get me,.. but in a reall and powerful, have to take notice sort of way.. Actualy it was a really good talk.. Even funny, i found myself laughing a few times.. I could relate to some of what he was saying..
A few other people shared (obviously) and again i could relate once or twice..
Anyway long story short.. Im VERY pleased i went tonight even though i almost bottled out before going in..
But i bought drink on way home and have started it/them.. And no im not drinking to celebrate going to the meeting as was once suggested by someone.. Im drinking because im an alcoholic..
Hi There Rob, If you keep going to AA, there is a good chance, that AA, will ruin your drinking. have heard it said many times. Hugs, Toni
Yeah i keep hearing that.. .. I expect it will. I felt again more ... part of it tonight.. im SLOWLY sinking into AA.. VERY SLOWLY.. But i felt better about tonights meeting.. I do things slowly im a slow learner.. as iv said on many occasions..
Hi Rob, I'm convinced that you are getting to the point when you are ready to stop harming yourself. If you are a problem drinker (and that is your decision) stopping sooner is a lot easier than having to go through all the S**t of detox (if you can do 5 days sober you don't need a detox), liver damage with possible transplants. Seriously Rob, it's a killer desease, I've brought three in over the weekend, all under 40, all alcoholics.......all deceased.
This post isn't here to shock you or scare you. It's here so you know that it is a serious thing. AA can help.... stopping drinking also helps.
Best wishes to you.
Chris.
Ps: I lied on the email, Maes Artro is still standing until June/ July. My internet source was incorrect. Apologies.
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"Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music." -- Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989"
Good for you for going to another meeting....and sober this time eh? I am one of those people who went to AA and drank as well for a while and then...like everyone says...AA ruined my drinking!
I couldn't drink without thinking about the people and the good feelings I got at the meetings. It kind of pissed me off at first actually. But eventually I decided to quit drinking and work the program and here I am today....grateful Recovering Alcoholic!
Well, however you got there, I'm so glad you made it to another meeting, and can start to feel the connection with others, Rob. Some day, I know you will leave a meeting and not stop anywhere on the way home. Go back and read the post where you told alcohol off. I love that one. Big Hugs, Wren
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Funny, isn't it, how friends and a Power greater than ourselves can neutralize nightmares?
