Hi Rob, I'm still drinking like a nutter at weekends, today I've been drinking since about 3 and am just about to finish now at 2.am so nothings changed really.
Sorry it can't be more positive but it cures something which I can't really define.....
"It cures something which I can't really define". A lot of us drank to 'cure' something. We found it didn't cure it, but only drowned it for a bit. we couldn't define it because we had obscured it with the drink. It is true that when we got sober we had to face whatever it was, and that was very difficult until we were into recovery enough to have some new and better coping skills for these things. Then we expereinced real cures in the fulfillment of the promises.
Myself, I find that when I feel something in the pit of my stomach, wanting to rise up to my consciousness in some kind of 'feeling' my first inclination is to drink it back down. When I resist that inclination the 'feeling' does rise, sometimes like the Loch Ness monster, and I have to go through a bit of a struggle. but I have tools now to do that, and the support of some people while I work it through.
then I don't find myself at the same impasse all the time,, but that I have made some real progress . And I'm grateful.
I've got you both in prayer today,
God bless you,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
it cures something which I can't really define.....
......The bottle is a symptom....It may "cure" what ails you for a short time but it always turns on us.......In the long run, if you "make it" you'll see the "cure" made everything sooooo much worse.....
Thanks Amanda, very helpful words. The cravings have gone again for another week but when Thursday night comes around again and I get the rising feeling, I'm going to make a special effort to let it rise all the way so I can be face to face with the fullness of it and see where it goes.
I define the feelings I try to drown as 'boredom' but it's too easy to put that label on it and not tear off the meat to see what the bones look like.
As I say, as always is the case, once Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights binges are done then Sunday is back to healthy eating and exercise till the next Thursday night swings around.
I'm not down in the dumps today though as I am learning a programming language and my girlfriend is coming round soon. Plus I have tomorrow off I never actually let myself get down too much and I tend to drink more when I'm happy than when depressed.
For me, when I let those feelings come up to try to face them,,, I need help and support... once the bottle is gone,, I need a friend. so if thursday comes,, and you are trying to face it... you can come here for our support in doing that. k?
sometimes, not always,, boredom is a sign of the emptiness of things in our lives... that our lives don't have any real purpose,, meaning, direction,,, fulfillment. That can be a stimulant for making some good changes.
Enjoy the good and meaningful things that you have described will be going on this week .
God bless you,
amanda
__________________
do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
I never actually let myself get down too much and I tend to drink more when I'm happy than when depressed.