Good morning all. I've not posted here lately, but do visit and read quite a bit. I wanted to share that October 9 (tomorrow as I post now) is my sober birthday. It sure seems like a miracle. I suppose that the last time I went a year without drinking was nearly 40 years ago when I was an early teenager.
Life is going well now. Drinking turned out to not be my problem, but was a symptom of my issues. I am experiencing a freedom and peace in sobriety that I didn't expect. I can only give credit to my Higher Power. I don't feel like I've done anything but surrender my will and follow His and just try to continue to do the next right thing. I will have to say a few words tomorrow at the meeting when I pick up my chip so have been going through my story in my mind and thinking of how I might share. Right now, with the X-Ray rear-view vision of Soberman, I'm not sure that I can point back to every really having fun drinking or finding any good that came from it. I can share about headaches, vomiting, blackouts, coming too finding someone choking me because I apparently said something dumber than hell, concussions from bravely taking on 'dares' while drunk, missing classes, getting fired from jobs, disappointing my wife and sons again for neglecting my responsibilities or for spending the extra money on booze or allowing/forcing relationships to go sour because I just refused to deal with stuff.
Instead, I think I might share about how diligently reading and applying the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous has changed my life and changed completely how I deal with every day. How starting my day with prayer and ending my day reviewing how God helped me get through another 24 hours without the need to take a drink reveals to me what I am or ought to be doing. How dealing with my emotions has been both thrilling and scary as hell and has been as difficult as anything I've ever done. How actually talking to my wife has led us to experience an intimacy that we've never had in nearly 28 years of marriage. How my sons have expressed an admiration for what has happened in my life and admit that they didn't even consider me to be alcoholic, I was just Dad and the joy of watching my 23 year old son move forward on his own sobriety journey. I might share about how I've seen the Steps in action through the words and deeds of others in the fellowship at meetings and at coffee shops. I might share how the 12 Steps have contributed to me being a better man, husband, father and teacher, today and everyday and how exciting it is to live sober.
Thank you for your encouraging shares and out there in life. Apparently I'm not the only alcoholic who has found the solution.
1 year sober is such a huge milestone, that it won't totally sink in until it is long passed. Big big congratulations to you and your loved ones.
Please remember as much as you would like to keep your share on the solution side of sobriety (who wouldn't!), there is always at least one person in a meeting who can not identify with anything going on. You just might have a drinking history that a new guy can identify with which will open up his ears enough to allow him to hear the solution.
[Insert the biggest 1 eye blink emoticon ever here]
I like your idea about what you will say when you pick up your medallion.
For me, (remember, this is just how "I" feel), I get kind of bored when somebody is talking about all the troubles alcohol brought to their life. It seems the stories are all the same. Hospital. Jail. Divorce. Broke. Homeless. DUI. Now, I'm not talking about the short shares people give during the meeting. I'm referring to the long anniversary speech the speaker of the evening is giving. Sometimes, they just go on and on and on and on and on and on about their drinking days. It's almost like they're reliving it, and enjoying it.
I much prefer to hear stuff like what you're talking about, Troy. So, Im with you on this one.
Congratulations Troy. I really like your post, full of humility. Something tells me you have joined the fellowship of the spirit. Not everyone gets that.
