I have been in recovery for 90 days and although I have seen the light, it has also been an intense struggle. I have isolated myself so as to avoid substances, and since 'winter is coming' (teehee), I am afraid that I will be even worse off than I already am. I have joined the gym, but it takes a lot of positive self-talk to get myself out the door and into the gym. I have developed a strange social anxiety, which I guess I often masked with alcohol, etc. Any recommendations on how to get past my own demons and attempt to heal them rather than hide them.
I really can't do better than quote Dr Bob, one of Aas founders. "But if you really want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know we have an answer for you. It never fails, if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the habit of showing when you were getting another drink"
Call the AA hotline in your area and see if you can arrange to meet one on one with someone to explain to you what AA is all about. We call this a twelfth step call and it is one of the most rewarding things we do in AA. But we can't furnish you with motivation. That's your part. You either want to recover from this terminal illness and are willing to do whatever it takes, or you don't.
In all seriousness, that "social anxiety" wasn't masked by alcohol...it was caused by it. I had the same problem. After some time, maybe a few months, if you abstain from alcohol, the anxiety will go away. It takes a little time for your brain to heal up, and get used to working without alcohol.
In the meantime, just suck it up, and go to meetings. You're gonna have to get used to being around people one time or another, may as well go to an AA meeting, cause at least there, most of the people know what you're going through.
You mentioned that you have been in recover for 90 days. Can you give us some more info about what your experience has been like so far? It may help others to assist you. For example, were you in an in-patient recovery center? Going to outpatient treatment or sessions with some kind of counselor? Have you had any experience with AA meetings during your recovery so far? If so, what was it like?
If you find a good one the meetings can be a lot of fun, particularly if you've been sober for a while and aren't a big emotional raw nerve ending. It's sometimes hard to do but go early and talk to people, just say hi and mention that you're new. Everyone understands what that's like and will go out of their way to make you feel welcomed. If you can stay and help tidy up, put away chairs, etc. and again, talk to people. Before you know it you'll be really looking forward to meetings.
Tipsy, that's fricken really weird...just the other day, I was gonna put a post up, saying how I thought that Howdy Doody looked like an alkie. This was before you put up that avatar. Strange.
I can't believe I'm agreeing with Tipsy, but he's dead on straight about going to the meetings ... 1st couple times are a little unnerving, but hey, so's getting plastered all over again too ...
Tipsy's post is right on the money ... just do it ... go, and you won't regret it ...
Love ya and God Bless, Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I can't believe I'm agreeing with Tipsy, but he's dead on straight about going to the meetings ... 1st couple times are a little unnerving, but hey, so's getting plastered all over again too ...
Tipsy's post is right on the money ... just do it ... go, and you won't regret it ...
We always have been, LOL ... although it's been a kinda tough love sort of thing, LOL ... you DO have your moments ... and sometimes, I find myself wishing you'd start listening to your own advice to others, that is if you're really still hit'n the bottle ...
I do care for you and wish you the best ...
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
We always have been, LOL ... although it's been a kinda tough love sort of thing, LOL ... you DO have your moments ... and sometimes, I find myself wishing you'd start listening to your own advice to others, that is if you're really still hit'n the bottle ...