hi everyone, i posted last friday to say i was looking for help in stopping drinking and thankyou for all your kind welcomes, when i posted my messege i did want to stop drinking but not so much as i do now, i have spent a few days reading over some articles and alot of your posts, i did a questionniare online "am i an alcoholic" i wasn't to suprised wen i answered yes to 12 of the 15 questions !!! i feel alot more positive about giving up drinking, i want to do this i need to do this, i want to remeber my childrens childhoods, i want them to remember a sober mum and not be embarresed of me i want so much in life and for me to achieve all i want in my life i have now realised i have to give up alcohol it has ruled my life for 10 yrs now, so its about time i take back some controll, i know it will be hard i have never known adult life without alcohol everything i have done since 16 has included my "best friend" the bottle but would a friend make my insides hurt this much and would they encourage me to hurt my family as much as i have and do, ooooooo sorry for the essay LOL just wanted to write down how i am feeling and actually admit to people (tho just on here) how i am really feeling about my drinking, i have not spoke to friends and family yet i feel if i take this first step for me on here i may beable to open up to those i love and care about, i havn't had a drink since monday, i no it may not be an awfully long time well its not much time at all but i am so proud of myself, i went shopping yesterday and fought the evil scream on my shoulder telling me just to get a bottle or two and some cans god i could have cried i just grabbed wat i needed and ran out of there but last night whilst sitting at the pc i felt so happy with myself i would useually have been wasted by 11 oclock and today i have been to the shop and i walked in looked at the beer and wine was so very very very tempted to the point of cracking but i did it i walked out of there smiling i have again resisted the temptation to buy a drink, if i can get to the end of the week i can look forward to the next knowing i have the tools inside me to say NO, just need to get thru friday nite with the girls coming round but i really want to do this i don't want my children to resent me as i do my father, sounds daft but i am so excited at the prospect of life without dependancy on alcohol, not to wake up in the morning with a thumping head ache blood shot eyes stomach cramps and the uncontrolable desire to get to the shop for a quick shot of vodka to stop me shaking and to "clear" my head !!!
sorry to have gone on so much i just wanted to say thankyou and looking at things one day at a time makes it so much easier for me to get to the nxt day sober
Read your Post, and congratulations on 3 days. No small accomplishment.
That shot of Vodka, that you were referring to, is that first drink, in AA, that first drink, is what we do not pick up.
There is a saying "one is too many, forty is not enough"
have you looked into going to a Meeting, that is where you will get the kind of support, that you will need. The internet can be great, but it keeps it private. Going to a meeting, changes everything. Face to face meetings with other Alcoholics can and does work, at helping you stay sober. (They are also very Private, but in a more personal way, more reality to it)
So I will say a Prayer for you that you pick up that 500 lb. phone book, and look under Alcholics Anonymous, and find a Meeting in your area.
Please stay in touch with us.
Toni
There are some new people that have posted, tha they just walked through that fear of going to their first meeting. The meeting begins, the fear goes away.
three days is so awsome, i am proud of u, i would see if i could find a aa meeting in your area and go . it will help and show u the way, others with the same things going on in their lives help me stay sober. and will help u also. glad u r here take care one day at a time wagon
Three Days **great**U broke the cycle. One day at a time. just get thru today. Tomorrow or friday isn't here yet. I hope you and I are still here tomorrow or friday. No gaurantee's
As said the first drink starts the train.
here's something I saved a while back
Dear Alcohol,
First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours.
As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays,
Hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions.
While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart,
I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:
1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night
2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.....
3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
Causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black &blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me.
Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.
4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities...
Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion
When I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than
Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.
Congrats on 3 days- keep coming back- 5 things help me- pray, go to a meeting, get a sponsor, call recovering alcoholics, and try to help others.
I don't agree much with Rick's list- maybe it was kinda like that years ago, but the last few were more physical and mental torture than they were amusing anecdotes- But since I've gotten sober, lifer has much improved, the days are a blessing at the moment-