Ideally, both members of a couple in love free each other to new and different worlds. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
We cannot possess another's spirit, even though we may desire to do so while struggling to feel love. We must not block one another's invitations for adventure even though we fear being left behind. We won't find the happiness we long for if we've tied another to ourselves by strings of shame, guilt, or pity.
Being free to love, or not, is the only path to real love. A trapped butterfly soon loses its splendor -- and life; likewise, a trapped lover quietly awaits the relationship's death.
Traveling separate, yet parallel, paths keeps a relationship vital. Bringing fresh ideas, favored hopes, and fruitful experiences to each other's attention is the enhancement a relationship must have to stay strong.
Let's not corner our partners but instead trust that real love is the promised gift of being free.
~ Karen Casey
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
*sighs* I realize that.. the expression 'bird in a gilded cage' has to do with people with partners who are very controlling, thinking that they are taking good care of their partner, but actually holding them in bondage. The 'gilded cage' is a very nice, pretty cage.. golden. Yet the bird is not free, being in a cage imposed by the partner, so that the bird is not free to fly as birds need to do,, but languishes in the cage that the partner keeps it in. I was in a relationship like that, and there is a song about a bird in a cage that I used to sing. I had to leave to preserve my life, cuz the other person was squashing me, even though the person thought it was taking good care of me,,, it was always only on their terms, and invalidated ME. It also goes for people who are not partners, you and I are not partners,,, but people in a relationship. sometimes it is a matter of degree.
love in recovery,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
Yeah, Doll, but just think about this. The program says that, even tho we may not like each other, we will come to love each other in a very special way. And that is one of the signs of real recovery. Are you ready for that?
love in recovery,
amanda
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do your best and God does the rest, a step at a time
The program says that, even tho we may not like each other, we will come to love each other in a very special way. And that is one of the signs of real recovery.
I've heard it said "I may not LIKE everyone, but I LOVE everyone" in the rooms many times. I've always called BULLSHIT on that one and leave it up to the individual.
So, I asked my sponsor and some oldtimers at my f2f about this and "real recovery" as you put it, they all agreed they've never heard it as part of the "program". It's " Listen to the messege, not the messenger" cause you never know when they may say something we need to hear....
Doll
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *