Characteristic of the so-called typical alcoholic is a narcissistic egocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence, intent on maintaining at all costs its inner integrity.... Inwardly the alcoholic brooks no control from man or God. He, the alcoholic, is and must be the master of his destiny. He will fight to the end to preserve that position. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p.311
The great mystery is: "Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths, fighting to preserve the 'independence' of our ego, while others seem to sober up effortlessly in A.A.?" Help from a Higher Power, the gift of sobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop drinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions of the men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reaching out to God and my fellows could I be rescued.
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
RESCUED BY SURRENDERINGCharacteristic of the so-called typical alcoholic is a narcissisticegocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence, intenton maintaining at all costs its inner integrity.... Inwardly the alcoholicbrooks no control from man or God. He, the alcoholic, is and must bethe master of his destiny. He will fight to the end to preserve thatposition.
_____ROSIE_____oh my fierce will that kept me alive during the horror, actually is now needing modification...sure, have will/discipline, but i had to learn the hard way that my **will** was not going to help me recover...it was blocking me from being humble, thus i was not reachable nor teachable.....yes, at "all costs".....i would like to think of my shortcommngs not as "defects" but 'affects" they kept me going....they showd how resourceful my inner child was to be able to do that and keep me in tact....so now?? i LOVINGLY change or give up these "affects" i no longer need....it is OK to be vulnerable...it is OK to be powerless, cuz powerless is NOT helpless........it is OK to not be in control, and thus release me from the "undoables" in my life........no more fighting for me
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p.311The great mystery is: "Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths,fighting to preserve the 'independence' of our ego, while others seemto sober up effortlessly in A.A.?" Help from a Higher Power, the gift ofsobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stopdrinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions ofthe men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reachingout to God and my fellows could I be rescued.
_________ROSIE______i would have died an alkie death had i NOT become AWARE of my defeat....and ACCEPTED that defeat, not until then could i take right action.....when i had to "cling on for dear life" for so long...letting go..letting god was nearly impossible.....the betrayal, and constant threat of serious harm or even death hung over me like an axe......to me ?? back then?? surrender was to be further assaulted.....now?? i have to keep telling myself that the evil is dead....it is OK and SAFE now to surrender...............reading this post, really shows me the absolute FEAR i had/ and still have to a lesser degree of surrendering to ANYthing.....it was my fighting him with what little i could that kept me just above the water line.......now i have to REassure my i/c that it is SAFE to surrender to the universe....the universe does NOT want to harm me................GR8 share, doll....this really hit home.............rosie
