"As we begin to function in society, our creative freedom helps us sort our priorities and do the basic things first."Basic Text pg. 83No sooner do we get clean than some of us begin putting other priorities ahead of our recovery. Careers, families, relationships - all these are part of the life we find once we've laid the foundation of our recovery. But we can't build a stable life for ourselves before we do the hard, basic work of laying our recovery foundation. Like a house built on sand, such a life will be shaky, at best.
#####ROSIE.....yeah, b4 i even KNEW about recovery, i longed for financial security/ emotional support/security/ family relationships.....romance.....i did not have the first brick towards my foundation.....NOW, i am forced to do that......i am alone....so i have noone BUT me to be with.....so its RECOVERY!!!!!! i didn't make any big decisions the first year, with the exception of name change....i HAD to change my last name....signing my name reminded me over and over of my rapist....so that was a "slam dunk"...a safe choice to make!!!!! but other decesions??? NO!!!! i am holding off, bcuz i want furthur recovery.......i am building ME first.....i know it "begins with me"....i have to be a "good/healthy" me b4 i can do anything and treat it right........this was hard to accept cuz i want i want i want....my needs went unmet for SO long SO painful....watching others get their needs met and i get passed by......going w/out my needs being met....now i know i have to build on me cuz i am the one who is going to meet my needs....it starts with me/ HP......i have to rescue me....meet my needs......yes, i WANT another to hold me/ do things with me/ comfort me/ be my friend, but in the end it is me......
Before we begin putting all our attention to rebuilding the detailed framework of our lives, we need to lay our foundation. We acknowledge, first, that we don't yet have a foundation, that our addiction has made our lives utterly unmanageable. Then, with the help of our sponsor and our home group, we find faith in a Power strong enough to help us prepare the ground of our new lives. We clear the wreckage from the site upon which we will build our future. Finally, we develop a deep, working familiarity with the principles we will practice in our continuing affairs: honest self-examination, reliance upon our Higher Power's guidance and strength, and service to others.Once our foundation is prepared, then we can go full steam ahead to put our new lives together. But first we must ask ourselves if our foundation is secure, for without our foundation, nothing we build can stand for long.Just for today: I will take care to lay a secure foundation for my recovery. Upon such a foundation, I can build for a lifetime in recovery.
########ROSIE....i am laying my foundation with the steps..literature....working on me...and yes, i KNOW i did not have a foundation...i am LAYING one now......my addictions/ coda made my life TOTALLY unmanageable.....i came to believe that a power bigger than me can restore my broken foundation....my broken soul and heart.....i know that this HP can repair the wreckage done to my little foundation when i was so young...i feel sometimes that my hp just has to break it all up, and begin again with NEW dirt NEW cement mix.....my HP and my willingness is CLEARING the wreckage from the site upon which i will build my future.......i PRACTICE the steps///slogans///meets///literature......i am learning NEW habits........honestly looking at me.....prayer/meditation to my HP......helping others........i am doing OK with my foundation......i think i am ready or near ready to go full steam ahead on claiming what the locusts and canker worms have eaten....i am ready or near ready for my new life......i ask my HP is my foundation secure????? i also turn over my will and ask for HP will.....my foundation is ready or NEAR ready.......as i prepare, i work on me....PRACTICE the program/ steps, et al......NO, i don't want things built on sand.....i want the REAL DEAL now....so if i have to wait??? i don't want to , but will accept if i am still laying foundation......i think lately i have been proving to myself that a...i am going to take care of me.........b..pray/meditate b4 i do big things.......c....practice discipline and moderation..........d...keep my inventory clean...........e...give over the fear/ need to control/manipulate/FORCE life, to do what i can, give over the rest, and TRUST that the process is working........i think i have made some BIG demonstrations of my foundation being laid on good ground.....
