Well, I got a call today, Saturday (unheard of) from my boss. As of next week, we will be losing 2 people from the workforce, one is fired and the other senior employee is simply moving on.
This means I am needed in a more medically "administrative" role right now. And I was working about 30 hours a week before, and will bump up to 40 now.
I am being asked to spend a lot less time with patinets and more time with the administratinve handling of stuff like organizing pathology reports, and giving patients some "not-so-good-news" over the phone. Giving them instructions, organizing some other computer-based medical practice issues, troubleshooting our computer paperless charting system, etc.....etc....etc.
I am SCARED!!!! Just when I got comfortable in my job, and began to thoroughly enjoy being on my feet and using a healing touch with folks all day, I have been told that they really need someone competent to do this other stuff, and that I was their choice candidate for it.
While I am honored to be thought of in this way, I am scared and worried. There is a lot of responsibility attached to a lot of the stuff I will be doing. I KNOW that I can do it, I just don't know if being mostly stationary at work is a good thing for me. I guess I will find out, because I said I would be willing to give it a try. I have been assured that after 5 or 6 months, if I decide it is not for me, I can go back to doing surgeries and stuff (the fun stuff) full time again.
Part of my fears lie in the fact that I do EVERYTHING around the house and yard. My husband works double time every week practically, and it has become the "norm" for me to take care of absolutely everything, whether it be the lawn getting mowed, something fixed, or buying a new appliance when one breaks. Not to mention all the "woman" stuff and chores on top of it. I am the only woman I know who even hauls the trash out on trash day!!
I discussed the "promotion" and increase in hours with him, and he is happy for me, and thinks I can handle it. But what we have not talked about yet is that I need for him to start taking on more of the share of stuff around here. Just simple stuff that would make things easier for me, throwing a load of laundry in once in awhile, etc.....
I guess this will be a transition for both of us. And as a recovering alcoholic, I do not much like change. Especially when I feel like I have "arrived" and am content with things the way they are. (LOL)
I really am grateful that in this economy in the US, my husband and I are gainfully employed right now. But for the Grace of God. But I do need some advice on how to keep a balance in my life right now. Taking care of my recovery, my mental health, and getting some rest, staying organized, in the face of big changes. There is going to be a period where I am EXTREMELY stressed out. I just want to know what the best recovery tools are for staying afloat during these big changes.
Thanks, Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Joni, you sound like you are doing pretty good in that your co. loves your work!
How about writing out tasks that are done on a daily basis and get husband to sign up on some of them. He needs to help you if you are going to take on added responsibility. Also considering you are in recovery.
If you both put down a schedule specifically timed so it is doable for both of you, it will feel more like mutually respectable chore work for each of you rather than a nagging feeling.
It is easy to be stressed when both spouses are working. Try to make it into bite size pieces!
You may need to hire on some inexpensive help to do some of it.
Give a prayer or meditation whatever you can do on it.
And if your husband is agreeable to discuss and create some good solutions that are practical, it will work out great for you both.
I dont' know anything about what the AA tools are, just the regular kind is all I have in my tool box yet. ; )
I agree completely about liking what you do being more important than the money. Hopefully your new responsibilities will still include enough of the "fun stuff" you mentioned! Sounds like you're willing to give it a try, which is good. Maybe there is some way to get the promise in writing that you can go back to your old position after 5 or 6 months if you choose to. Congratulations on the promotion!
Craig
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Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.
While I am a newcomer...I am somewhat aware of the tools you might already have as far as AA offers. Being further along in the steps, you might have reached the "practice these principles in all our affairs" point. If that is the case, the 12 steps would be the way to go. Basically, recognize you are pretty powerless over whether it goes in a way you will like versus not like. Give it over to your higher power and trust things are going to work out one way or another. Catastrophizing and projecting are things alcoholics do way too much of right? I know I sure do as you could see in my posting. Plus, you might take a step back and realize that you do know how to "intuitively handle things that used to baffle you." You've been doing it for a while no? This may just be the biggest challenge and change to come along for some time but not necessarily a bad one.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Good Morning Joni ((hugs)) I can hear my sponsor... "What are you doing worrying about all the stuff that might happen?" I'm always having to be reminded to live one day at a time and to take care of the things that come up "when" they come up. I sometimes like to amage the worse so I won't be disappointed or so when and if I fail, I can say "see I told you". I hate change too!! But, you have been "choosen" and are needed. Take what you've learned and "pass it on" my friend!! There are people who need you and the message and morals you carry!!
I think pinkchip hit the nail right on the head with, "Catastrophizing and projecting are things alcoholics do way too much of right? " Yes, indeed!!! Projecting... catastrophizing... these things will only make me go INTO this with a shitty attitude. And not much good comes of anything if I don't go at it with the right attitude.
And Jane, "What are you doing worrying about all the stuff that MIGHT happen?". I KNOW BETTER than to do this to myself! I am the calm practical one among my friends, who is always saying, "nothing ever turns out as badly as your worst fears... those NEVER get realized. They are worthless." Maybe it is time I started taking my own advice??
I guess I have grown accustomed to being in a routine now... I can fly on autopilot at work right now, as I have become so good at what I already do. Being "new" to something again is stressful. I am not the Type A personality person, the person who takes big risks and starts their own business, etc. I am the "just show me what to do and let me develop a routine" person. I guess there is no reason to believe that I cannot, in time, develop a good routine at this new stuff.
My stress is mostly caused by ME and my broken thinker. Just give it to God, and then DO IT has to be my motto I guess. I am going to have to get more exercise too, since I will be on my butt all day instead of running around (and I LIKED being on my feet!). Maybe I can look into one of those Wii Fit thingies....
Thanks so much for all your help and support, pals. As usual, you all collectively say the very things I need to hear.
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Another thing I want to do is do a Royal Clearing Out of all the excess crappola around the house, it will be much easier for me to manage on the weekends if my house is LESS like Sanford & Son, and more like a minimalist.
(Wish me luck on that one!!!!) :o/
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Don't even be thunking it, Joni! Get yo ass to class! lol I got back today after the season's two week break & I'm so glad to be getting back on form. Such therapeutic value ;) Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
