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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Alcoholics Anonymous -> Alcoholics Anonymous -> Let me make it through today..
Post Info TOPIC: Let me make it through today..
paul86


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Let me make it through today..
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The worst part is the first couple days, when the feelings of fear and physical discomfort are at their highest. Once I get past these first couple days I notice a huge difference in how I feel, and it's not as hard to not drink during the week. After not drinking for a few days I feel great. It seems to be the be weekends when I get into the most trouble. Last night I had no intentions of drinking, but what do you know, my friends older brother and some of his friends started a poker game, and there's me pouring myself a drink and sitting down at the table. (Even though I did end up winning!) I woke up this morning in such fear and discomfort, getting through a full day of work seems like it will be an impossible task today. I almost want to call in sick.. but the people at my work won't buy that I don't think. I just hope and pray that I can make it through the day and then rent a movie and relax tonight and try to have a half decent sleep so i'll feel a lot better tomorrow.

It's true, for the moment I have not quit drinking. But if there's a positive to be taken, i'm drinking the least amount I have since I really started my "drinking", and after every week I realize that this just not working for me. I managed to not drink for close to 2 weeks a little while back and I felt like a new person, I was back in the gym and was feeling great. Then I decided to drink again. It's tough when you're my age (21), all my friends like to go out and play pool at bars etc...and with that comes getting beer. The opportunity is right there and when all your friends are going it's often very hard to say no.

I know I will be in great discomfort today, but let me make it through my work day. Any help appreciated. cry

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StPeteDean


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Hi Paul,

Welcome back. The event you described was of a typical relapse. I had plenty of them. I too tried quiting at age 21, and 18, 16,15, 27.... I got sober at 29 but what a tragic waste of opportunities (college, marriage, career...) and losses of everything imaginable along the way. I think that you should re-read some of your posts here, particularly this one

http://aa.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42735&p=3&topicID=14810002

One thing (amongst many) that we alcoholics have in common is a short memory. Our brain tells us to have drink and that everything is going to be ok. We need to be able to counter that dialog with facts from the past, as in our pattern of behavior and the the results of same.

The answer to you social problem lies in getting involved in young peoples' AA meetings and fellowship and letting go of your "old friends". Call the AA number in your phone book and ask where the young peoples meetings are, along with beginner meetings. You can also look online for these meetings,if you're in a metro area (which you probably are if you're in college) you'll find plenty of them.

Dean

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turninggrey


MIP Old Timer

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Hey Paul,
Hope things get better for you today! Hey, when you say "It's true, for the moment I have not quit drinking", then you have got to expect that this scenario will happen again, and again. Being hungover is a terrible thing, but its probably the clearest time for you to remember why you should "get with the program" and make your way back to peace. I really hope you can see your way down to a local meeting and find out the history of AA and why it works.
Good Luck,
Tom

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jonijoni


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Hi Paul.

Sounds like you might need to start filling up your weekends chock full of AA. Meetings, meetings, meetings. Get out to some sober clubs, make some new sober frineds in the rooms. Find some people you can identify and share a friendship with, that you can be accountable to. I did this, and "it works, it really does..."

Welcome, and so glad to meet you. Keep us posted, and get online here this weekend if you feel squirrelly. But stay busy in AA!!!

Joni

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BGG


Senior Member

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Dear Paul:

I ditto what others have said here.  It is really important for you to dive full into the Program, go to sober functions and lots of meetings to develop new friendships.  I got sober at age 24 and am sure I would have felt that I was "missing out" on something but for all of the fun I had at meetings, sober dances, picnics, conventions, etc.  Remember, it's one day at a time for each of us; you can make the decision right now that you've "had enough."  Get thee to a meeting!!!

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