One of the things that I find really challenging when trying to quit drinking is the thought of how I'm going to enjoy the company of women. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I need to be drunk to be with a woman, it's just that it's always been part of my MO to have copious amounts of alcohol involved when getting to know someone. I don't know how I'm going to function without my usual liberal dose of social lubricant.
Seriously, I feel like I'm funnier when I'm drunk, wittier, more charming...and I definitely get better looking. I don't even like to make eye contact with myself in the restroom mirror until about my 5th double vodka & soda...then it's Brad Pitt eat your heart out
All kidding aside, any of you feel this way? How did/do you deal with it?
TM that's just one of the many things that we have to learn to do sober. It is said that we have to walk through a lot of fear in the process of getting sober. Relationships, dating ect... are at the top of the list of why we had to drink. And while we were teenagers with not a lot of life experience, it did help us get by. But now we really don't need alcohol to meet, date, and form meaningful relationships, and honestly it just gets in the way.
I figured out pretty quickly that I had no idea why or how to date women plus I knew that I didn't have much use for them if I wasn't sleeping with them, as I had zero women friends outside of the wives of friends (and I wanted to sleep with some of them too). If you really want to get to the bottom of this issue, take a 4th and 5th step on sex. That, as they say, separates the men from the boys.
While I don't recommed marrying someone in the program (lani I'm already apologizing) dating in the program, after you get a handle on your sobriety, is very beneficial if if you communicate about your feelings etc.. Relationships, however, in my opinion, are the number 1 reason for relapse.
One of the things that I find really challenging when trying to quit drinking is the thought of how I'm going to enjoy the company of women. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I need to be drunk to be with a woman, it's just that it's always been part of my MO to have copious amounts of alcohol involved when getting to know someone. I don't know how I'm going to function without my usual liberal dose of social lubricant.
Seriously, I feel like I'm funnier when I'm drunk, wittier, more charming...and I definitely get better looking. I don't even like to make eye contact with myself in the restroom mirror until about my 5th double vodka & soda...then it's Brad Pitt eat your heart out
All kidding aside, any of you feel this way? How did/do you deal with it?
Hi all, Glad a women got in on this thread! Thanks wanda! I cant even imagine dating at this point in my sobriety. (thank god I am married and my hubby is in the program-no offense taken Dean) Im messed up enough as it is and most of my relationships (if you can call it that) had alcohol involved. Warning-dont go to the website posted!!!! How did you ever find that!!!!! I guess some people might benefit from it!!! hahaha.......
The funny thing is, we think were all that when were drinking when actually were probably so gross! Loud, obnoxious ...weve all been or come across someone like that!!! So Tipsy, work your program for now and before you know it ...you'll be able to look in the mirror and you will def be hotter than brad!!!! I know Im getting close to being as hot as..........Just kiddin! Lani
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Even to "occasional woman drinkers", drunken men are disgusting and nauseating. Same applies to drunken women. The only thing is that drunk folks "think" they are 'all that'... WRONG. (This is part of our disease of perception.)
Give me a shy, awkward guy any time over a pompous arrogant drunk.
Joni
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~~"It's hard to be hateful when you're grateful."~~
