Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions, especially concerning other people? They are only feelings!
In the course of a day, we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to someone who is selling us a service.
We may deny that we feel frustrated, angry, or hurt in reaction to a friend.
We may deny feelings of fear, or anger, toward our children.
We may deny a whole range of feelings toward our spouse or the person with whom we're in a love relationship.
We may deny feelings provoked by people we work for, or by people who work for us.
Sometimes the feelings are a direct reaction to others. Sometimes people trigger something deeper - an old sadness or frustration.
Regardless of the source of our feelings, they are still our feelings. We own them. And acceptance is often all that is necessary to make them go away.
We don't have to let our feelings control our behavior. We don't have to act on each feeling that passes through us. We do not need to indulge in inappropriate behavior.
It does help to talk about our feelings with someone we trust. Sometimes we need to bring our feelings to the person who is triggering them. That can breed intimacy and closeness. But the most important person we need to tell is ourselves. If we allow our feelings to pass through us, accept them, and release them, we shall know what to do next.
Today, I will remember that feelings are an important part of my life. I will be open to my feelings in family life, in friendships, in love, and at work. I will feel my feelings without judging myself.
From The Language of Letting Go
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Good morning! Like Doll, Just what I needed today! Im the queen of denial, especially where my feelings lie! Yesterday I had total feelings of embarrassment...I FINALLY have 30 days!! I was almost embarrassed to get my coin because I have been going to meetings everyday for 4 months!!! So many people congratulated me without judgement!! Funny not one person had a negative comment!!! God is Good! Lani
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Yesterday I was hanging with the wifey and another couple and an arguement the other couple was having plus a couple of things my wife said totally brought my head into some past crap. I couldnt shake it. I feel the hurt, the fear, the anger, etc... I went out to my meditation spot once everyone left and my wife jumped in the shower. I basically came to the point of just having to accept that this is going to happen from time to time. I guess I am grateful the times are becoming futher between. I also have some tools such as trying to remember the part I played. Also just trying to act as if my life is not a conglomeration of the past but a choice I am making today. I decided that based on just today I am happy and love my wife and so much want to be with her. These things did help and I was able to get along for the rest of the night. Reminds me of Bills story when he talks about being "plagued by waves of self pity and resentment".
Acceptance is a state of mind. Once I lose this, I start to get irritated and frustrated. When we are irritable, it usually means we are not accepting and living WITH and IN the momment.
