Denial is fertile breeding ground for the behaviors we call codependent: controlling, focusing on others, and neglecting ourselves. Illness and compulsive or addictive behaviors can emerge during denial.
Denial can be confusing because it resembles sleeping. We're not really aware we're doing it until we're done doing it. Forcing ourselves - or anyone else - to face the truth usually doesn't help. We won't face the facts until we are ready. Neither, it seems, will anyone else. We may admit to the truth for a moment, but we won't let ourselves know what we know until we feel safe, secure, and prepared enough to deal and cope with it.
Talking to friends who know, love, support, encourage, and affirm us helps.
Being gentle, loving, and affirming with ourselves helps. Asking ourselves, and our Higher Power, to guide us into and through change helps.
The first step toward acceptance is denial. The first step toward moving through denial is accepting that we may be in denial, and then gently allowing ourselves to move through.
God, help me feel safe and secure enough today to accept what I need to accept.
From The Language of Letting Go
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Yeah, Don't Even Notice I Am Lying! Tis a funny one to lie to myself. I had a bit of an epiphany on this a couple of weeks back. I was always struck with the extraodinary occurance of this kind of defence as it seemed to be self~defeating in some way. If I truly knew what I was up to what difference would it make? I guess my conscience would come into play & the pain of it would be too great especially if I'm particularly focused on whatever it is I think I want or need. There's the selfishness in play & a defect at work. I'm learning that if I can set my wants & needs to one side I can be more objective about what the right thing to do is. Just goes to show how driven I can be by my emotions & lower forces! This is where I can aspire for a greater good. My emotions can cloud my thinking any day. So I keep trying 1Day@aTime. Progress not perfection. I know what I have to do in order to grow along spiritual lines. Thanks for the post, Q. Great food for thought, Danielle x
How funny are you, Phil! Hope you're well & fighting fit. Blesses if you need a 'pickmeup' ;)
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Denial????!!! Nope!! not me!!! Maybe a touch delusional, but NO DENIAL!! lol