Any suggestions on how to deal with obsessing thoughts. My mind won't slow down. Same thoughts, same situation, lots of anger. I've talked on the phone, gone to meeting today, but thoughts keep whirling. Anyone else with same experience your sharing would be most helpful. Thank you.
Congrats on 30 (I think) days! Woo Hoo! and Welcome to MIP. I'm so glad you're here. I'm Jen, alcoholic in S.C.
Post your thoughts here, spend some time with another alkie, talk to your sponsor, read the BB, 12&12, service work, journal your thoughts/feelings.....Make another meeting......Keep coming back....
(((Hugs))))
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
That's a tough one Dona. I don't know what the situation is contributing to the anger. I have had times that I have felt anger and had a hard time getting the person and/or situation causing it out of my mind.
Sometimes, I have found that I need to get really involved in some other (hopefully positive) obsession in order to get my mind off of it. It also helps me to get really involved doing some kind of work that really demands all of my attention, and particularly if it also involves a lot of physical activity.
The last, best thing I find helpful is to get with some friend or friends and engage in some social activity, (again doing something that requires a lot of my attention).
Hope some of this helps. (PS. I have also found release from obsessing by writing on this board.)
Thank you so much for your input. Much of the anger is because I am being the scapegoat for everyone in my family's problems. No one else thinks they need help or does anything wrong. If it rains and it is supposed to be sunny, well I'm to blame! I've been vacillating between beating myself and wanting to beat them up. I've worked the 1st step and I know I'm also powerless over them and do want to control me only and needless to say, I don't want to pick up a drink.
I'll try all these suggestions. My sponsor has been wonderful and keeps telling me to be good to myself and take it easy on myself. I hate myself as it is, let alone having my family express their anger blaming me for ALL their problems. The family is so dysfunctional because of "our alcoholism" and I wonder how I will ever progress when surrounded by so many sick people. Will I get through this. I have to. It's a life or death situation.
But, then I ask, what good is life if there is no one there to share it with? I've been estranged from one child for 10 years, and now am losing a second one.
on the thoughts/anger thing. You just got to keep busy and don't spend too much time alone. Just keep distracting yourself from those resentments, it won't change anything thinking about them. Eat, Sleep, exercise, and take vitamins. Be good to yourself and be grateful that you open your eyes in the morning. Every day is a holiday, and every meal is a feast. thank somebody for it.
Welcome to MIP. It's a great board and there are some super people here.
Congrats on getting your silver chip. That's terrific.
Try to get to as many meetings as you can, they all help. I make sure that I speak to another recovering alcoholic every day. I have plenty of AA literature and make sure to put some time aside each day to read and reflect. And, try to take it easy on yourself. You are doing so well.
It also helped me to keep busy because then I didn't have too much time on my hands. After I had cleaned the house from top to bottom and done all of the jobs that I had been putting off for years I took up walking. I'm lucky living very close to a national park with some wonderful walks. It helped me to feel more peaceful.
Please keep posting and letting us know how it goes for you, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
I know that the steps are in an order for a reason and realize that, at 30 days, you might not have gotten "that far" yet, but... ONLY my Higher Power (HP) was big enough to rescue me from myself and the lure of drink - especially early on. When my mind gets to racing, I hand it over to my HP, ask for release, help with this. Ay first it felt ridiculous, but it actually WORKED for me (miraculous!).
I also used the other tools: sponsor, meetings, phone. Somehow the full combo worked, thuogh people still get to me now and then.
Way to go on your coin!!Yahooo! Thats great!!! You will find this site very helpful and encouraging. Everyone has so much love and wisdom to share. I personally look forward to coming on here every morning and throughout the day to share my feelings or pick up a bit of hope from others! Im finding the best thing I can do is to keep busy. Not with the everyday stuff, I tried that in the beginning and it dosent help. Hit as many meetings as you can and really be willing to listen and absorb what you hear!! Make a new circle of friends in the program. Try going out to eat or going to a movie whatever with people when they ask, at first Id make excuses that I was busy. If you can, ask others to get a coffee or something after a meeting. Im learning that surrounding myself with people I love helps the most. We had a meeting the other day about families and how some drive us crazy. See them in little time frames if possible. You are working on you and hopefully they will see a change in you and want what you have. I was told here you need to lead by example. Im working on that and it is hard work but I see a change in my kids. They seem happier when Im sober or in a right frame of mind. We cant change who our family is.A few people shared how they had resentments towards family members and didnt talk to them. These family members passed away and they had to live with the guilt of not saying what they needed to say to them before they died. Be honest with your family. Tell them whats going on in your life. Pray for them. I have to say, I am really learning to listen and take other peoples advise. I kept trying to do it my way and failed miserably! So...Good luck to you!! Youve got the tools now put them to great use!!! Have a great day! Lani
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Thank you all so much. You have given to me "just what I need." I will use all the tools you have suggested. I've come to love recovery alcoholics, and I now see I need to include myself since I am an alcoholic also! Hugs to you all.
