Sometimes this is the one message that is often the hardest one to comprehend and so often overlooked.......ecspecially when realization comes that perhaps the disturbance has its roots within one's own making. It does become easier, however, after one's epiphany. It is then one can begin to change things.......starting with self.....and moving forward. One may not be able to change or control others, situations, ect. What one can do, however, is hand these over to HP and trust that there is a reason. Wanda
Once I learned about acceptance, it sure did lessen the complications, frustrations, and anger in my life! When I was drinking, everything was something to fight and rebel against!! Life is so much simpler when I remember the "acceptance words" from the BB. Thanks. Dogmama
Im glad you posted that. I needed to be reminded. I just got back from a meeting. Lot's of the people I got sober with in 1993 have been at meetings lately. Word can not say how it feels to hear people you got sober with talk about being sober all those years, and here I sit with 6 weeks. I had to walk out of the meeting tonight . That feeling of being a loser hit hard while One of the folks I got sober with was sharing. The hardest part is not having anyone who has been in my shoes to talk about it with. I realize most of it is pride and ego., but I just cant get past thinking that after 13 years I f-cked up. I have got to find a way to get past that or I know I will drink again. As I was sitting outside taking a smoke , thinking about what I did, The thought of just saying the hell with it all. Just go get drunk because your such a loser. It wasnt a craving, just a thought. My sponser was there and after the meeting , I told him how and what I was thinking. The problem is, thankfuly he hasnt gone back out, so he cant understand where Im coming from. I know that only God and time is gonna make me feel better about myself. Until then though, I just dont know how to accepte the fact of what happened. If any of you are reading this, and the thought that you can go out and then come bouncing back in, let me tell you, thats bullcrap. I think that trying to get sober this time is harder than when I first got sober back in 93. Some how, some way, Ive got to let go of the past so I can move on.
