Still no sign of Cammi, my missing chicken, I'm sure something got her :( managed to catch my little pheonix roo in the trap this morning lol set it again tonight... wondering which one gets the treat of bologna and bread and pays the price of sitting in a trap till we get up in the morning lol
My guinea seemed to have a high fever today... I got to play pharmacist... mixed up aspirin solution for him, then was told to mix up epsom salt solution just in case it's botulism... was more concerned with getting his fever down first, and will try the salt mix again tomrorow.
Now... question on sponsors...
overall i like my 2 new sponsors... but... one, which is the one I talk to more... most of it she is telling me her experience, which I know is fine... but I feel like she's pushing things that she shouldn't be pushing... concerning my relationship with bfshe was really pushing my idea of moving out, and is still sorta pushing it now, and suggesting I got to a halfway house... she doesn't understand my thing with the animals at all... that's something I realized is a downside, to having a new sponsor now that didn't see me when I first moved here... I've changed a lot this year, with getting off the meds, and getting these critters... she actually suggested today that bf and I don't discuss the program at all... well, um, as long as we're not working each other's programs, it's ok to discuss it right? I mean, sometimes the only meeting we can get is here on the farm, just the 2 of us, because there are times we can't get into meetings and such, we do have our own little meetings here sometimes. my bf won't try to pick my sponsors or anything, but he just met this one a couple of days ago, we spent time with her for the 4th, and he pointed out that she is very judgemental, whicdh I was able to see a lot in things she said... I don't know... I'm wondering where to draw the line, as far as her input on my relationship. I do understand sponsors aren't your relationship counselor, although with past sponsors I have been able to at least talk about whatever is going on, without them pushing me in any direction ya know? my last sponsor I found out didn't totally approve of my relationship or situation, but never said anything really.
my bf's ex-wife's sponsor pushed his wife to leave, so I can see why he's worried about that with my new sponsor, and wel, it worries me a little too... should I say something to her about it? Thing is, I like her a lot, and she's great as a sponsor besides that... I don't know... where do you draw the line? how do you handle something like this?
Gosh, your hands sure are full right now, aren't they? Nothing boring about farm life.
About sponsors--you know I won't give you advise on something so personal, right? LOL. I just know that for myself, I was blessed with a sponsor that wouldn't take any doo doo from me, almost fired her a few times, but found it healthier to listen to her honesty (which I didn't always want to hear, but guess I needed to). All I can say is follow your gut instinct. If somebody is treading in an area that we don't see eye to eye on, I avoid conversations regarding that issue, or just tell them "this is where I'm at in this area, so lets work on something else". I had to learn, am still learning, to differentiate between someone giving me guidance and someone with their own "stuff" coloring their views. I guess we all just do the best we can by our sponsees, and I'm sure she's coming from a loving space. But the relationship between sponsor and sponsee is pretty sacred in my eyes, and keeping things open and honest is a priority for me. Colletta and I don't always see eye to eye, I guarantee, but she's had my back for many years, and I know she's popping on me out of love. We're all human just muddling along, eh? I bet it's hot as all get out in NE right now. Were those baby lambs born yet? (that was a redundant statement---"no chris, only adult lambs are born here this year, but we're hoping for some baby sheep".)Ok, slap me. Love love love
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"Never argue with an idiot... They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience..."
Running late for work this morning, but I did want to respond.
I have never ever had a sponsor I agree with 100% of the time.
This is not to say there aren't good and bad sponsors out there, because there surely are.
My best ideas damned near killed me.
I have learned to listen in spite of the fact I may NOT agree with my sponsor.
Even after almost 17 years, I can get sidetracked and lose sight of what IS important in my recovery.
Just my two cents.
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"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguements and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
~Herbert Spencer
I know I won't agree with my sponsor 100% of the time, just well, I've never had a sponsor seem to be so pushy like that... my first sponsor never said a word about my relationship with my ex husband, never pushed me any direction, and even when I decided to leave him, encouraged me to just separate for awhile, but when she saw my mind was made up, she admitted to me she was glad I was getting out of it, and that she knew from the beginning either it wouldn't work with me and him, or I'd keep getting drunk. She wouldn't tell me that until after I made my own decision. My last sponsor, most she really said about me and my bf was she brought up that first year suggestion with relationships, then left it alone.
I did talk to my other sponsor, Shellie, about it a bit, not like the trying to turn your sponsors against each other thing, and she knew that's not what I was doing, but I just didn't feel it was right, Terri being so pushy... Shellie agreed, said she wasn't sure why Terri was pushing so much, except that they were concerned about my sobriety, with how rough things have been lately... and she also told me neither of them has ever sponsored someone before and that Terri probably doesn't totally know what to do... Shellie said she wants to sit and talk to me soon, with no time constraints, and wants to get to know me better, and wants to know a bit more about my relationship... she said she wouldn't even think to really give suggestions until she knew more about the situation, and that even then everything's ultimately my decision...
Shellie also said as far as what Terri told me about not talking to bf about the program, she said that both of them have "normie" husbands, so they don't know what it's like to be with a recovering alcoholic, that she understands that we'd talk about the program and she doesn't think there's anything wrong with it... I mean, we go to meetings together ya know, and afterwards we talk more about the topic and stuff... a lot of what we talk about winds up being recovery related.
Anyway... rambling as usual... lol
Wren wrote:I bet it's hot as all get out in NE right now. Were those baby lambs born yet? (that was a redundant statement---"no chris, only adult lambs are born here this year, but we're hoping for some baby sheep".)Ok, slap me. Love love love LOL Yes Chris the adult sheep were born, 2 of them...hahaha 2 little white lambs, about a week ago, one's actually kinda more gray than white. So, we've got 3 little families out there now... 3 mama's each with 2 babies... they're absolutely adorable :)
Yes, it's really hot here, pretty humid too. we've been running sprinklers nonstop, we haven't had rain in quite awhile, the grass started turning brown... gotta get it green again for those sheep, neighbor's havin to bring over produce for them lately to supplement what little grass they're able to eat. At least the sprinklers cool it off a bit too... my turkeys are havin a field day out there playin in one of the sprinklers... I've been watchin them to see if they try to drown themselves... lol I've had people tell me that turkeys will stand in the rain with their heads up, beaks open, to get a drink, and they drown themselves... bf's sponsor used to have a turkey farm, said when it rained, they had to run out there and rescue the turkeys LOL
2 little white lambs, about a week ago, one's actually kinda more gray than white. So, we've got 3 little families out there now... 3 mama's each with 2 babies... they're absolutely adorable :)