Norma and Donna, were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house.
Norma who was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in.
Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you throwing those nails away?"
Norma explained, "When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw them away."
Donna got completely upset and yelled, "You moron! Those nails aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!"
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Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie? They had gone to see "Closed for the Winter."
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A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, and still nothing happened. Her blonde roommate saw her and asked, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Duh, like... HELLO! You need to roll up the windows first."
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AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...
A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss asked sympathetically, "What's the matter?"
The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away."
The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, "Why don't you go home for the day? Take the day off to relax and rest."
"Thanks, but I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have a better chance of doing that here."
The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual. A couple of hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out from his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically. "What's so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?" he asks.
"No!" exclaims the blonde. "I just received a horrible call from my sister. Her mother died, too." --------------- um...My name is Phil......and I live in Australia..:)
Have a good day Mate!!
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"LOVE" devoid of self-gratification, is in essence, the will, to the greatest good...of another.
I am blonde and 6' tall to boot. However, I can appreciate a good blonde joke! Those were both excellent!
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"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguements and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
~Herbert Spencer
Mmm, Phil. I agree, those were excellent jokes, and I choose, just for today, to not fulfill your death wish, LOL. Anyway, I'm not all blond. Got alot of grey interspersed with brunette, so just don't tell any grey jokes.
And do let me know if you decide on that elective surgery, eh?????????
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"Never argue with an idiot... They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience..."
