I am really struggling right now. My life is unmanageable. I absolutely have no control over alcohol. I cannot do this alone and I need help. I am willing to do anything it takes to be sober.
I have ave gone to AA a couple of times but never long enough to work the steps or find a home group. I do listen to speaker tapes every day.
I want to make a solid plan and would like to get some help from you guys. I feel like a failure and I have so much shame and guilt. I will write more later but I just wanted to get this out there.
Welcome to this discussion forum, Nursie. Glad you found us. You've been having a tough time. Same as most of us here at one time.
Yes, please share some more. Reach out to us and we will reach out back to you.
Do you have any AA meetings that you could go to? Soon. My first thought is that it would be beneficial for yo.j. to get to a meeting and let a group welcome you.
I am really struggling right now. My life is unmanageable. I absolutely have no control over alcohol. I cannot do this alone and I need help. I am willing to do anything it takes to be sober.
I have ave gone to AA a couple of times but never long enough to work the steps or find a home group. I do listen to speaker tapes every day.
I want to make a solid plan and would like to get some help from you guys. I feel like a failure and I have so much shame and guilt. I will write more later but I just wanted to get this out there.
Thanks for listening. Any advice is welcome.
Welcome to MIP Nursie, ... so glad you joined us here ...
Most everyone here has been where you are right now, we came to realize we could not go on do'n the same thing over and over and over ... if we were to recover, we needed to change AND, like you, became willing to do anything to make that happen ... SO ... go to a meeting today, the sooner, the better ... go to several if you can ... look for someone that seems 'happy and content' to be sober, ask them to sponsor you and start working on the steps ... and as you get comfortable with one 'group', make it your 'Home Group' ...
None of us 'wanted' to do the work', but it meant we survived or we died ... we've lost too many in this world who just wouldn't work this 'simple' program ... we will help you all we can here, but you gotta show up and let us know how you're do'n ...
Love ya and God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Thank you both for your replies.
I cannot attend an in person meeting until Saturday but I will definitely do as many online meetings as I can. (Thank you for the link!)
My son burst into tears this morning and although he blamed it on something else, I know it is because of me.
I am just trying to make it through the work day today without crying and then I will scoop him in my arms and spend some quality time with him.
Then I will participate in a meeting.
I have a notebook and I'm journaling like crazy. I have so many feelings.
I am glad I found this place.
Problems with alcohol is an emotional 'roller-coaster' to be sure ... I just wanted to emphasize that there is more to come in 'recovery' before we can put our lives in 'perspective' and proceed to that 'happy existence' that we all search for ... ... ... Please 'BE PATIENT' ... it'll come in due time, and you'll be a better person for it ...
Never give up on sobriety ... just don't drink, or use, just for 'Today' ... tomorrow will take care of itself ...
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I can relate to your intuition with your son. Being a mother with this infliction/epigenetic prediposition throws on a whole lot of guilt about having it... and it's already tough parenting in our disconnected ... non village type society.
Just remember that today you will not drink no matter what.
Just today.
I can verify that parenthood, while always challenging, can be an opportunity to break this cycle of dysfunction in a long history of it. I have seen miracles within my home and family. Especially beyond year 1 and 3 of focused attention to applying spiritual principles originally learned in the 12 steps for me.
Where ever you grow... love will grow all around you. So as you continue your growth beyond your initial growth through surrender... Please keep us posted here. We're rooting for ya.
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
