Pretty depressed. Bored. Anxious.

I'm mid 30's and have been drinking pretty consistently since 18. Way way over did it this weekend and I've caught myself thinking "I have to quit"...again. I'm divorced because of alcohol. On Prozac for depression. I just need something and I don't know what it is. 

-- Edited by Christopher Robin on Sunday 3rd of May 2015 05:05:42 PM

Did you go to meetings? Was you embarrassed?

No. I haven't. I feel like an emotional basket case right now...how will I fall asleep tonight? I wish I could go to sleep now and stay asleep for weeks. Do I make all the same promises I did in the past? How will I de stress after work tomorrow?

Hello Christopher and welcome to the board, we'll family in here. . Everyone's been pretty much where you're at. I remember
being depressed and it was mostly about my divorce and being lonely, beating myself up about it. I stopped drinking, attended meetings
daily, met folks in the meetings, wasn't lonely anymore. After a couple of months of not drinking, things began to improve steadily. I was 29
when I came in, 25 years later, it's been an amazing journey, and frankly hard for me to believe, but it was only possible because I got and
stayed sober, and the folks in the meetings showed me how. Stick around, get to a meeting, don't be afraid the people in meetings are
very welcoming and understanding, after all, we're the people that you used to like to drink with, but have found a way to be happy without
booze.

You got it, that's why we're here I see that you live in TN, I have a mountain home in Boone NC a mile from TN. Pappy
lived in TN. What part are you in?

-- Edited by StPeteDean on Sunday 3rd of May 2015 06:29:37 PM

I'm at a loss as to what to type. So many things are scattered thru my mind right now.

Are you near Chattanooga? If so, here's a link to the AA office for that city and the surrounding area.

http://www.chattanooga-aa.com/

This can help yo find local AA meetings and there is a  phone number you can call to speak with local AA members (  423-499-6003  ). These aren't doctors or therapists, they are just regular folk like you and like us who had a serious drinking problem and have now found a way to stay sober and actually enjoy it. They are volunteering their time to help other people do the same, because that's what other people did for them. I encourage you to check out the site and give them a call, and talk to them about getting to some AA meetings.

Of course you're also welcome to talk to all of us about whatever is going on. We've all been there. 

Hi CR!

Welcome! You've found a good place for support and recovery, lots of caring people here.

I've also been where you are now- getting sober and feeling like crap. I was depressed because coming off alcohol my body was in shock. After the shock wore off, I became bitchy. (Me? Bitchy??). I had all kinds of negative thoughts until I took a quiz in an AA pamphlet and the score surprised me so much I knew I was an alcoholic before I ever went to a meeting. I wasn't embarrassed, I was relieved because the people there were laughing and enjoying themselves. They talked about life without drinking and I wanted what they had. I learned something useful from each person who spoke. They sent me home with the Big Book, the 12&12, a Grapevine magazine. Those books were the beginning for me to grasp the program because I wanted to get sober.

As time goes by, sobriety is easier. The days become weeks...months... Years. The Program of AA has transformed my life and now I'm happy with the person I've become. I can't say all days are roses but I can say I have a clear mind to handle the problems when they do come up. I now have a solid support system. I look forward to the Tuesday night meeting in town. I also use this site to be encouraged and to encourage others.

I encourage you to go to a meeting and don't be embarrassed. After all, everyone there is there for the same reason you are. You don't have to do it alone. AA isn't a program we do alone. I'd credit AA for saving my life! I was a mess prior to getting sober. I can't say its been easy but I can say its been worth it!

Best wishes to you! You can do it!

Jerricka


-- Edited by Coogi on Monday 4th of May 2015 12:50:54 AM

 

 

Aloha CR and welcome to the site.  I pretty much nod to what the others have suggested as a path to recovery...they know and know that they know because as Pappy has mentioned we have worn your shoes.  I was had to convince when I got into AA after a long time resisting and threatening those who suggested it to me.  I was working with no information and the wrong information from the start and I was comfortable in my hell.  I had years of questions and disbelief which the invitation to "keep coming back" helped to settle.  There are many in the program like this and me however so much of what I heard in the rooms and then practiced made my life so much better.  I started to experience being sober...thinking straight and doing the right/good stuff and being okay with myself without booze.   I also went to college on the disease...I had to know because of coming from a place of deep unknowing.  I was born and raised in our disease and I learned about disposition and why my first drink at the age of 9 foisted on my by my grandmother while my mom fought her not to became so important to my understanding.  I will never ever forget that first spiritual blast I got from that glass of cultural Rose.  I thought God was in the bottle...really.   I found out that alcohol among other things is a chemical depressant and learned a great reason why I should stop.  I was then and for a long time a depressant personality, down, anxious and angry all the time.  Our disease is progressive...if not arrested by total abstinence it gets progressively worse terminating in insanity and death.   You know how it comes out...we've read the stories.

My help suggestion is to go to as many meetings as you can in the next 90 days...go early and stay late.  If you can get to 90 meetings in 90 days that's a good start for a new sober habit.  Find out the meetings in your area.   Good luck.   

Hi CR, 

Glad to hear from you again! You have time to call that local AA number today and ask them to help you find a meeting that you can get to this evening, or go on the web site and look up the meetings yourself if you prefer. Please keep in mind that no matter how much encouragement and words of support we give you here, it's still up to you to take the action yourself and get to the meetings. So find a meeting tonight and go there and then come on back here and tell us how it went! Some tips:

1. Get there a few minutes early. It's more comfortable than walking in after it has started.

2. Tell some people that you are new and looking for advice and help. They will take it from there.

3. While you are at the meeting, get a copy of the "AA Big Book" and pick up some copies of any other literature they have (most meetings have several types of free literature for new folks)

4. Also get a copy of the local AA meeting directly, and ask some folks at the meting if they can recommend another meeting for tomorrow, and the next day, and then when you go there you'll already be seeing some familiar faces.

5. Stick around for a few minutes after the meeting ends and talk to some of the folks there. Again, let them know you are new and they will help.

 

Then come on back here and let us know how it went!

 

I will do my best. Thanks. Think a few Benadryl would help out tonight?

Benadryl shouldn't be used for a sleeping aide, it's for bee stings etc.... It lowers heart rate and blood pressure and who knows what interactions could occur with other meds or alcohol.
Sound advise from Dave. Get in to see your Dr.

How are you doing today CR? 

Good work, CR.

Don't look back, you only got to dry out / sober up Once!

Glad you're hanging in there, I know its not easy. You absolutely don't have to do it alone. A meeting can give you a lot of positive energy you cant get from being alone in recovery. Try it, you might like it...and you're only a stranger once!
Best wishes,
Jerricka

My recovery started in a recovery home in 1989 then straight into AA.

I was an alcohol and Valium abuser and felt just like Christopher Robin does.

Commitment to AA has worked as advertised www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf
Please read the document slowly and precisely. It is simple and straightforward. AA has saved (and continues to save ) millions.

Get to meetings, that is where the magic happens.

Good luck.

Bob R