Alcoholics Anonymous
Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Staying sober makes a difference in life


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Staying sober makes a difference in life
Permalink  
 


It's 3:58 am and the birds are chirping already, that's a good sign, not so much that it will be a nice day but it will be a sober - sobah -day, i know when i was out there

drinking like a fool and could care less about anyone or anything in my life because i was to self centered and selfish the birds never existed i couldn't hear them even i

f i tried , all that mattered was the booze and how i could get it, thank you God it's no longer like that and it's because i have so much going for me , i am a grateful

guy , it's a far cry from where i was almost 11 months ago...



__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 3726
Date:
Permalink  
 

Welcome to MIP I loved the post. Congrats on your sober time.

__________________

Thanks for everything.  Peace and Love on your journey.  



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 638
Date:
Permalink  
 

As time goes, with sobriety intact, there'll be more of these beautiful awakenings within you. I love sitting on my back step at dawn and listening to the world wake up as I do the dusk when it slowly goes to sleep. Those are the most peaceful times of the day. It is also, for me, the best times of the day to have those
heart to heart talks with HP.

__________________


MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Welcome to MIP Bostonstrong, ... ... ... Congrats on 11 months ... loved your post ...

By the way, Boston is still in my prayers for those hurt and killed in the marathon ... stay strong, Bostonstrong ... ... ...


Pappy



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'

Col


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 310
Date:
Permalink  
 

Great post! Welcome:)

__________________


MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 891
Date:
Permalink  
 

Awesome, Bostonstrong!

__________________


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Thank you foks i appreciate the welcome, life here in "Boston" is getting back to normal , whatever that means, we're pretty strong and we will ALL get through this horror

together, i am actually on my way into Boston in a little while to pick my wife and sister in law up at the airport, this to would NOT happen and i could not be counted

on when i was active, what a freedom it is to be able to be there for others today " life is good " don't take this the wrong way but the desire for me to drink has been lifted

a dat at a time, God has blessed me with so much since i got sober in June of last year , what a disaster that was, i try my best to focus on what's in front of me otherwise

i fall victim to the negativity that is everywhere and trust me you don't need to look far , if you're looking for it, on the other hand i try with everything in me to surround

myself with positive people , i have no time for toxic people , life is to short , i have it pretty good these days and i refuse to sabotage it now, God bless ALL OF YOU

tank you for welcoming me , i think i' going to make it a point to visit here quite often. :)

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

I'm with you there bostonstrong, ... where your view on negative and positive people are concerned ... I've got a negative sponsee that sometimes drives me nuts ... I don't think I've seen him smile more than once in six months ... and I don't care to be around 'toxic' people either ... I have learned through this program, that 'happiness' or 'misery' is something that one chooses for themselves ...



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Pythonpappy - If you knew me when i first got sober you would NOT have wanted to be around me , i was a miserable P**K and for the first 2 months thats just the way it was

and it had alot to do with my fear in letting people " IN " i was to afraid of being hurt so i " ACTED " as though i was angry most of the time and it worked, people stayed away

from me however after a while my world became very small and closed in and i felt so alone and i'm not sure when but one day i started to hang out after the meeting and talking

to people and slowly i let people " IN " and i remember saying to myself one day " this isn't so bad afterall , and it felt good when i would show up at the meetings and people

would say hi or if i wasn't around for a few days they would ask me " where have you been , are things okay " now let me just tell you when i was active no one was asking me

how i was doing or if i was okay, more often then not i was told to screw we don't want you around, so now that i'm almost 11 months sober , i will share with you that

i have been married about 5 years and my wife said to me last month when we were out to dinner , " i love you more now then i did when i married you " or i can sleep at night

because you're sober " Alcohloics Anonymous has saved my life, my marriage has never been better , actually its better then it has ever been , i love God he has been so good to

me i am truly blessed with this unmerited girt of sobriety, now don't get me wrong i have my days / moments when i want to scream - i have PTSD and Bipolar - they really

controlled my life for a long time, i was molested as a kid for 11 years and i'm not sure if it set me up to be an alcoholic but i do know when i found the booze i fit right in ,

the abuse ruined me and ruled my life for YEARS AND YEARS i was parylized with fear , afraid of people and i still have major trust issues but nothing like they used to be

actually they are minor compared to about 2 years ago , i have been in therapy for 17 years and it's been a God send ,it has helped me tremendously i have no idea

where i'd be if it wasn't for my therapist, i am a good guy who has alot to offer , a few years ago i couldn't say that because i didn't think i did have anything to offer

anyway life is good and it's not anything i'm doing, i mean i'm doing  the footwork and God is helping and guiding me, but for me to continue to maintian my sobrety i need to

comeplete the AWOL (  we are on step 9 ) i'm in and not quit , i never finished anything in my life and i have done alot of work on my recovery and did alot of work on myself because afterall

what's the alternitive right, i have no choice in a drink the desire for me to drink has been lifted, i have been blessed with this gift and if the day ever comes that i do want to

drink i have plenty of numbers to call people who will be there for me , one person in particular, i have met alot of good guys in this program but this guy i am speaking of

i can tell this man " i love you buddy " and he says it back i could NEVER tell someone i loved them i didn't believe in love nevermind another man, he is a solid guy with

awesome recovery - i hope you're doing well and life is good for you , as alcoholics we tend to fight the system and end up in a jam , i know when i reach out to another

alcoholic and get " out of self " my day is pretty good , i hope you stay in touch , may God bless you always, be gentle with yourself , no one else will, YOU DESERVE TO BE SOBER and don't

let anyone tell you otherwise, Tae care bud....laughing.gif

Rich



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Tuesday 30th of April 2013 01:30:13 AM



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Tuesday 30th of April 2013 01:35:40 AM



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Tuesday 30th of April 2013 01:41:00 AM

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Pappy - It's awful having your innocence stolen , although it doesn't matter how old you are if you're molested its awful , it's a road i wish on no one it comepletely changes your

way of thinking about life and how you see the world and the people in it , trust issues forget it , they're the first to go and any kind of relationship i was in intimate or

otherwise i deliberately sabotaged because i was so filled with fear, it's not a coincedence i drank , although i didnt start drinking until i was in the military , 21 , i wish i could tell you

who it was that violated me because it would really put things in perspective as to why i wanted no part of a relationship , life is good today , sobriety is critical for me, i go to

therapy 4x a month because i still , after all these years outbursts of anger and paranoia and voices i have PTSD / Bipolar and i have days i just want to hide from the world just

get under the covers and shut everyone out , however the blessing in my anxiety is i don't even think of a drink , the desire for me to drink has been lifted that in and of itself

is a miracle, keep in touch pal - love ya to brother.

Coop



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Tuesday 30th of April 2013 11:32:53 AM

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Thank you 'Bostonstrong' for that story about your own recovery, it does remind me that we ARE sick when we come to AA ... AND that some of us are sicker than others ... as it says in the 9th step promises, 'sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly' ... I have found that I cannot change the attitude of others, yet I can let them see an example in my attitude for them to see what lies ahead for them if they work the program ...

And those that come into AA with 'mental illness' in their back pocket often do find they can change their attitudes if they allow the healing program to work for them ... the ones that 'get to me' most are the ones that almost seem to think they are 'unworthy' to experience any kind of happiness, they feel they must remain sad because that is all they deserve ... they are hard nuts to crack ... some make it, some don't ... and it is gut wrenching to watch ...

I was molested in college and it was the hardest thing for me to get out of my head ... The event is still buried in my head, but I have learned that I don't have to let it rule my thoughts and actions ... I now seek guidance from 'above' and live like I feel God wants me to ... I have learned to seek His/Her will in all things ... cause there ain't a darn thing I can control ... and I truly think that our 'happiness' is a choice, plain and simple ... (before I got sober, it seemed like I enjoyed being miserable, like I wanted everyone to 'pity' me for some reason ... like ... I can't help being the way I am, sort of thing ...)


Love ya man and God Bless,
Pappy



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hey Coop, ...

looks like we have a lot in common ... my first drink was a few weeks shy of my 21st birthday ... I was in the military too, cause after the college deal, I just wanted to disappear, so I enlisted ... this was during the 'Viet Nam era' ... ... ... I didn't care ... my mind was really twisted around by then ... I just wanted to get away ...

It wasn't too bad for me though, I did a lot of growing up in the military ... and alcohol didn't take control of me for a few more years after that, but man when it did, it didn't take long for the downward spiral ... I feel that you know the story all too well ... ... ...

It's been over 5 years since my last drink now and everyday I give thanks to God for the miracle he chose to bless me with ... He/She has removed the desire to drink from me today also ... some think I've gone AA nuts, but you know, it's a lot better than being the kind of nuts I used to be ...


I do love you brother and God Bless you, and I truly mean that from the bottom of my heart,
Pappy



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

You know , i am thoroughly convinced it's us survivors who bond well and understand each other more so then your typical alcoholic - now all you wonderful alcoholics out

there please ,please don't take offense that is NOT my intent simply a figure of speech - anyway i will tell you this as well i was in the Navy and i was tortured in bootcamp

for 4 days no food,no sleep,no water,i forced to do the 12am -4am watch to the point i thought my knees would buckle, there's more to it but i'll leave well enough alone, as a little kid i was in foster care - moderators

might step in, i hope not, i'm simply getting to know Pappy, but i was yet again molested i don't work i can't work i'm on SSDI and 100% service connection , anyway i'll


chose my words carefully when it comes to vietnam, you guys were treated awful although do i really need to tell you that, anyway brother you're worth it, do NOT

let anyone tell you otherwise, take care pal, stay strong.

Coop

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hey Coop, ...

Sorry to hear you're having to live on disability income ... I know you'd be working if you could ... my youngest son is also on SSDI ... (quadriplegic) ...

I was a lucky one during Vietnam ... 1 year school in avionics then assigned 'Instructor' duty for 3 years ... I took orders for four years and that was enough ... but you know the difference during that time ... my buddies coming back in uniform were cursed and called 'baby killers' and even spat on coming through the airports ... it's not like today where every returning soldier is treated like a hero ... A LOT Different ...

Jane Fonda betrayed our country to the degree it got a lot of our soldiers killed over there and she spread communist rhetoric over here stateside enough to turn most civilians against anyone in the military ... I wore my uniform 'off base' at my own risk ... This was a time of great mental confusion for me and I did find some comfort with King Alcohol ... he became my friend ... for a long time too ... I'm really grateful those days are in the past ...

I think the good Lord has kept us around for a reason ... so, yes, I think we are both worth it ... to show to the new-comers that no matter the hardships we've been through, we can learn to trust in God and recover to leading a useful life of some nature ...


Bless You Friend and Brother,
Pappy



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Pappy my where did you go my friend , we were on a roll there for a while, anyway i hope you're okay , drop me a line , take care and God bless.

Rich

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

I'm right here Rich ... I check things out here daily ... if you'll look above, your last entry after mine is 4 days later ... I didn't go anywhere ... (I was hiding around the corner so I could spook you, but I fell asleep ... LOL)



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

PAPPY - I have to disagree with a few things that are said ALL THE TIME at meetings and it just does not sit well with me at all - that is we are "SICK" , that's unfair and misleading at best because the last time i checked when I ARRIVED in AA i was a human being first then i was someone who was on the verge of being desperate to get better , however this being "sick" is wrong and it really needs to be eliminated from the vocabulary of those of us who think as such !

 As far back as i can remember people tell you " you're in these halls to save your life" so say what's on your mind ( no swearing) all of a sudden we're in a hollier then though enviroment and therefore you can't swear oh come on - i am very direct and i have been this way for a while now(since 6-15-12 my sobriety date) and i think it's again, unfair when some poor girl or guy is spilling his guts about whatever it is they need to "get off their chest" and it's misconstrued as negative or you're not grateful when really it's someone who is struggling - THEN (and it's happened to me several times) when the meeting is over someone has the audacity to approach this person and tell them they shouldn't be talking about this or that PAPPY it's wrong ,since when do we have a right to tell other members what we can and cannot say ( all of a sudden we now have the AA police patrolling the hall(s) like they own the place , i'm surprised when i was approached i didn't snap , my sponsor tells me all the time " Rich when you're in a situation you're uncomfortable with or getting angry , take the high road , you'll be better off you did ! disbelief

Coop



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Saturday 20th of December 2014 05:30:14 AM

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 3809
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hey Coop! Glad you are posting again and still sober a year and some later... I also see some of the things you mentioned in AA as well, BUT - I know it happens for a reason and it's not worth getting that upset over when you weigh it all out. Considering we (alcoholics) are a bunch of very opinionated folks, it is a miracle we don't kill each other every meeting. So...I understand why someone might say "please don't curse" because some struggling single mom or something might have to bring her kid to the meeting one day or also people might just not want to hear the F bomb every other word. No biggie. Now I also understand that there is a difference between letting someone spill their guts because they have to and someone deciding to take the meeting hostage with their off topic bullcrap. I also understand people don't go to meetings to hear the opinions of someone who hasn't really done the work. For example, when I was new, I recall going to step meetings and then trying to share about my experiences when I had not even worked the step yet. Someone told me after the meeting that it was better to listen and not share at step meetings if you had not worked the step yet. I was all hurt and offended at the time, but it was just my ego. I took it to my sponsor and got over it.

That being said, there may be a time when you just encounter a bossy and controlling jerk in AA or someone who is very rigid or has crappy people skills. Such persons may spout big book at you and tell you how wrong you are about this and that when they may have less sobriety than you or they may toss intellectualized garbage at you and never share anything about themselves. Nobody appointed them teacher right? I get it. Been there...seen that and I have probably treaded on being that person too. I guess the best we can do is forgive them and focus on our own recovery.

As far as being "sick"...well, years into sobriety now, I can say I am still sick. It's fine. I think at 2 years sober, I also felt like I was mostly better and it bothered me to hear how "sick" we were all the time. You are at the stage of sobriety where you are no longer showing the glaring symptoms of the disease but it's more about a spiritual malady, emotional sobriety, and just improving the quality of your life. Does it mean you are still "sick"? Not really, but it means there is still work to do AND you absolutely will get sick again if you slack off.

And then the last point I wanted to make: After all that, if people bother you and you disagree - Screw them and just do you. If you see something you don't like, be the solution as best you can. If you don't like things you hear, then say what worked for you instead. It's okay. You are there for you and not to let yourself get too bothered by others. Seriously - do not let annoyance at others drive you out of the rooms because I think we've all felt that too.

__________________
Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!


MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 788
Date:
Permalink  
 

Congratulations on 11 months!  Glad you're here with us now.

Blessings, Mike D.



__________________

http://mikedauthor.blogspot.com/



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hi Rich, ...

I think PC made a great post ... very logical if I say so myself ...

Everyone at an AA meeting is in varying degrees of sobriety (recovery) ... to say we are a 'sick' bunch is an understatement ... but I agree, perhaps that cliche is overused ... because some of us have made great strides to get well ... for the most part, I think we were (are), spiritually ill ... we came into AA either not knowing a higher power (or God), or if we had one, we had lost contact or communication with such, and we find that we were missing out on what life is really all about ... we were, or are, 'spiritually bankrupt' ...

So, in meetings we are going to hear a lot of stuff from those who are new, those who have been around a little while and 'think' they have a handle on 'how this works', and those who have many years and can be AA nuts (fanatics) or AA compassionate ... (we should never forget what brought us into these rooms)(and how fragile we were at that time) ... some of the old timers have forgotten how 'words' can hurt when they become adamant about how things should go or be said during our meetings ... we should always tell others that we 'suggest' this or that rather than insist ... (alcoholics hate being told what they must, or must not do !!!) ...

I've heard it said that 'foul language' IS NOT a sign of 'spiritual progress' ... and so I've made great strides in this area myself ... also, most of us are still very judgmental towards others but we try to keep our opinions to ourselves rather than vocalize it ... it serves no purpose to demoralize others ...

Great topic, glad to see you're still around ... post more often!!! ...


Love ya brother and God Bless,
Pappy



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

What i think about when i read Poppy and pinkchips post is - " As Gods people we stand on our feet we don't crawl before anyone "

end of story !

God bless both of you !

__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hey PAPPY i have three words for you and i'm NOT being a smarta** !


I LIKE YOU , which is to say i really respect you i like what you have to say on here( i can tell you have been sober a while),and it seems as though you're a lot like me , you call it like you see it , i just wish we didn't communicate so late at night maybe if you're up for it we can figure something else out ( what about facebook )

God bless , talk to you soon pal ! God makes sunrise sunset look easy.jpg

 

 

Coop



-- Edited by bostonstrong on Monday 22nd of December 2014 03:01:36 AM

Attachments
__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hi Rich, ... I'll PM you ... Facebook usage bothers me a bit ...



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:
Permalink  
 

Morning pal - I don't know what to say - i hope things are better with you , i know when we spoke last you said you had a stroke, i'm so sorry Rog i can't imagine what you're going through, be good to yourself and we'll talk soon i love ya pal , God bless you always

text me if you feel up to it , no pressure of course,

Rich Cooper



__________________

Be the change you wish to see in the world !



MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357
Date:
Permalink  
 

Hey Bro, ... Morn'n to you as well ...

Hope you got your ice 'n snow problem under control ... I wasn't at my best when discussing that issue... if I felt half-way decent, I'd grab my hunting gear and go 'ground-hog' hunting, LOL ... you know, that Punksutonie dude ... we don't need this extended cold A** stuff ...

Huh, Had a stroke is putting it mildly ... All that is still a little fuzzy ... wife was 'out-of-town' on business, I got up, had breakfast, took my pills, and was soooo tired I went back to bed with Rose (my dog) ... I remember very little of that day ... wife called me late that even'n as she usually does, I answered the phone ... I was still in bed, and when I answered, I said nothing coherent at all ... she kept asking questions and I tried to tell her I was okay, just tired ... she did not understand a word I was saying ... she was 200 mi. away and called our city's 911 system ... and not knowing what they were facing, the Sherif's dept came with the Ambulance ...

Day later I came to my senses ... after CT scan and MRI tests, TIC the Dr.s called it ... got more meds to take, and came home ... this, of course, delayed my radiation treatments ... all of which cause extreme fatigue ...

I think I'm beginning to feel some bit better, some days are better than others still ...

I want to emphasize to those of you out there going through 'detox', if you drank like I drank, please detox under a Dr.s care ... strokes are highly likely during detox and many are not reversible ... (even though I wasn't detoxing, this time, the results can be the same) ...

Always feel free to text me if you wish ... It just may take some time for me to get back to ya ...



Love ya brother and God Bless,
Pappy (Rog)



__________________

'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.